


Is this a bad omen?

by No_anonymous



Category: Homemade - Fandom, freeform - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Actors, Drama, Drinking, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, Explicit Language, F/M, Humor, I am not good at tags, I will upload as fast as I possible can, Love, Parallel Universes, Sex scenes later on, Smut, This is a non-fandom story, To our own, Trying to be funny, another world - Freeform, dream - Freeform, singer - Freeform, tragic past, written in first person
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-04-23
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:22:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 28,940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23772250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/No_anonymous/pseuds/No_anonymous
Summary: Listening to the sound of the landing airplanes and watching people rushing through the airport with small annoyed, gossip talk and rolling suitcases and knew that my journey would be awesome. Heading for check-in and the security, I waited in line for my turn. It took forever. The big lovey dovey couple in front of me just minded their own business. I guess. But still knew how to smear their love and affection for one another into everyone’s faces. I guess I couldn’t blame them, because I would properly done it myself if had that kind of love in my life. As the line finally moved and they couldn’t remove their hands away from one another to follow only to place them back in the exact same spot, I knew just that God really wanted to have a laugh today. The couple did not hold back. Both of them running their hands up and down each other’s backs, both of them kissing so hard that teeth could be heard scraping against each other. Moans and grunts erupting from both of their throats. Oh, dear God! Come on.
Relationships: Main character/no real life person will be mention
Kudos: 1





	1. Let the journey begin!

**Author's Note:**

> If people like it great. Sorry it is not a fandom, but even I like to read a story that is made up by plain fictional characters. I hope people will enjoy it. And I will apologies before hand, my humor sucks, now ou are warned.

Listening to the sound of the landing airplanes and watching people rushing through the airport with small annoyed, gossip talk and rolling suitcases and knew that my journey would be awesome. Heading for check-in and the security, I waited in line for my turn. It took forever. The big lovey dovey couple in front of me just minded their own business. I guess. But still knew how to smear their love and affection for one another into everyone’s faces. I guess I couldn’t blame them, because I would properly done it myself if had that kind of love in my life. As the line finally moved and they couldn’t remove their hands away from one another to follow only to place them back in the exact same spot, I knew just that God really wanted to have a laugh today. The couple did not hold back. Both of them running their hands up and down each other’s backs, both of them kissing so hard that teeth could be heard scraping against each other. Moans and grunts erupting from both of their throats. Oh, dear God! Come on. When it was finally the couple’s turn, relieve finally entered my body and I could finally be free from watching the foreplay before the start of the porno film. But my luck only last that long. The guy checked in at the counter, then turned towards me with a look that said “ew” and “what are you looking at” while his whole face was red, and pupils dilated. Then he huffed and scooted of as the girl gave me the same look and followed after him. What was their problem, I wasn’t the one moaning in the waiting line! Or maybe because I starred to much that I properly seemed like a person getting of on that. GREAT. But now it was finally my turn. I walked up to the lady behind the counter and handed her my passport, working visa and ticket with a big smile on my face. The lady behind the counter did not look as happy as me. Her eyes were droopy, lips tight and twirled up into an annoyed smile, bigger than my own biological father and her hair was pressed together to tight into a burn that nothing could penetrate that hairdo. She was paler than a ghost and if she did not have deep brown eyes and hair, I would have then confused her with a ghost. She accepted my documents, looked through them and when she arrived at my passport, she looked down on it, up on me, down again and up at me before talking. “State your reason for entering the country?” Her voice was so deep that if I didn’t look at her when she spoke, I would surely had believed that some old, greasy man had talked to me.  
“Um, I am here for work. That is what my work visa is for. Right?” Her question confused me a bit, but she properly asking for security measures. “Good. Write here in this column your workplace and employee.” She handed me a document which had the size of a little notebook page with questions regarding, who is my boss? What is my workplace called, ect. “I thought all of this was already taken care of?” I said concerned. The lady only grunted, typed something on her computer, before addressing me again with angrier eyes. “It is for security measures. Fill. The. Form.” I could only nod, never been much of a fighter and been told often that I am to kind for my own good. I took the form and left the line while nodding to her again, while she glared at me as I left. Crazy woman. I was so certain that only good would come my way, guess that’s karma for you. I found a small standing table, placed the form, as a fumbled through my handbag luggage for a pen. “Always keep a pen on you, cause you’ll never know when you will need it.” my mom always said and for once she was right.  
Well… While I fill out my form, let me tell you a bit about myself. I am on my greatest journey and I may not look as much but I am on my road to become a great singer! I have always wanted to be one since I was a child, as a teenager alcohol and boys were more my cup of tea. But now, 25 years old, could not look more ordinary and are even overweight, but as my mother said, “It is good to have some isolation, then you can handle the winter better.” Which is not really the issue for where I am heading. I come from a Scandinavian country where snow and rain are everyday life, but now I am heading for Hollywood where the climate is not in that freezing section. A small production studio had hired me and said that they believe I could become something big. We agreed that I worked and paid for training lessons as well as some recording and they paid my trip as well as providing jobs for me. It sounded like a crazy scam, but the life I had led just didn’t do anything for me, and I had that feeling that my life could become greater if I took a chance. So, I did. I kissed my mother goodbye, said farewell to all of my “friends” and said that I would called when the opportunity rose, even though they never believed in me, and bade farewell to my sister and brother. I know the journey will be tough, leaving the only three people in my life that have ever mattered to me behind, but drowning myself into work, recording and training sound also fun. Ha ha… Right.  
I have finished my form, waited in the long, god forsaken line again, with the only luck that the only couple left were this old couple that used more of their time on arguing than enjoying each other’s company “Did you hear me Albert!?”  
“What?”  
“Fart!”  
“You are not smart, you old hag!”  
It was so hard not to giggle, and I hoped that the did noticed that I made a little snort when they raised their voices even louder. When the old couple were finally through, it was my turn. The lady was still behind the counter, didn’t have the droopy eyes no longer, only annoyance was left in them. I handed her the form and she stamped it, handed it back and just yelled “NEXT!”. With a little jump in my body because of the loud deep voice she shrieked out, I left. I bought some snacks and soda before heading for the gate, I came in good time, cause every child should know that when leaving with a airplane you better be in good time, cause no one knows what could robe your time and make you late for the plane. Listing to my music on my Ipod as I waited for the magic sound of dings and a woman stating that people leaving with the airplane to Hollywood have its gates open and are ready for passengers.  
Boarding the plane and finding my seat, which was not the best in the world, but I didn’t sit next to a baby or an old, farting man, so it was fine enough. As I sat down in my seat, regret and a aching pain started to spread in my heart and I could not determined whether it was butterflies or stomach acid that swirled around in my stomach which made me uncomfortable. Did I remember everything? Did my mother remember to download skype to her computer, so that we could talk? Did my sister ever solve that fight between her boyfriend and herself? Was my brother on his way on being a father now and will now forget his dear little sister? Will I ever meet my nephew? Will they even notice that I was gone? Will they even miss me? No! Stop it! Do not go there! Take a deep breath, through your nose and out of your mouth. Think happy thoughts, like… If I succeed and become a big, known singer, then I can finally give my mother that weird ass fish she always wanted. Give my sister a ticket to meet her favorite actor or actress! Give my nonexistent nephew a vacuum and teach him how to clean! That is a dream I want to fall asleep to. As the stewardess finished up on her instruction on safety in the plane, they left to sit down a buckle up. I buckled up myself, adjusting the seat to a good sleeping position and closing my eyes to my last thoughts that would bring me an even greater dream.


	2. You got to be kidding me!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 1 and 2 are being uploaded right after each other. Since it is corona virus time, I guess I will just have some fun while it happens. Oh and good lord you have made it to this chapter, I hope it is not to cheesy and you properly are wanting to pair some people up now or guessing where this is heading, but! I am not done yet. ;)

As the plane landed in the international airport of Hollywood, I walked out together with the other passengers. The airport was enormous, coming from a small country compared to America you just knew that there was a lot of this world, you just haven’t seen yet. After searching for ages for a wagon to carry me luggage, I finally found the section where the rest of my luggage was. Ages after that again, pushing and pulling every single bag onto the wagon, I truly felt a workout has been completed that day. On my way to the exit I saw a taxa chauffeur with a sign with my name written on it, “Astrid Hansen”. I walked up to the man with my wagon pilled up to the brim with luggage with a big smile on my face. “Hello. My name is Astrid Hansen, I believe it is me you have been waiting for.” The look at me, giving me an elevator look, up and down then up again, “Papers.”   
“Oh, right.” I fumbled through my handbag, found my passport and work visa, and handed it to him, hoping that that was enough to prof it was me. He looked through the papers, before handing them back to me and smiled to me “this way please, ma’am.” “Ma’am.” I whispered to myself low enough for him not to here as I followed him to the taxi parked outside of the airport. He took the wagon and placed it behind the trunk of the taxa and started loading my luggage into the taxa. I felt bad for him, because I have just struggled to lift it onto the wagon and was about to ask him about whether he needed help. But before I could open my mouth he was already done and was on his way to remove the wagon. He just stood dumbfounded. I really need to workout more. I sat in the backseat and the driver quickly returned and to the driver seat. “So, where are you taking me? To the apartment or are we swinging past the studio first?” I asked the chauffeur as he started to pull the taxa out of its parking spot. “I have been instructed to deliver you to the studio first and when you have finished your business there, then I will deliver you to your apartment.”   
“Okay, sounds great.” I nodded in agreement to his instruction and just laid back in the seat watching with glee and exiting fear for what there is ahead for me.   
Everything was beautiful. The sun was shining with a powerful gleam, trees taller than any trees I have ever seen, traffic was no joke and crazy. I will definitely stay with either a bike, metros or busses. Driving will be suicide for me even if I consider myself an excellent driver. I know manual stick because you were not allowed in my country to learn anything else. But I will not take my chances, knowing my luck, I will then definitely die. So, I guess it is better to stay on the safe side. But even the people were interesting everyone different and glamorous at the same time. Looking away from the people living their lives, shops, and stores. I felt like a little girl again going to Disneyland for the first time. If starts could pop out of my eyes, then they have already done that. Watching and observing on the whole trip and didn’t notice that the car was coming to a stop. It was first when the car stopped completely and the driver exited the taxa, I noticed we weren’t moving. I hurried opening my door and exiting as well. The driver gestured with his hands towards a building. “Go to the front door. At the reception just state who you are, and they will help you with the rest. I will wait here for your return.”  
“Thank you so much for your help. I promise that it will not be long.” The driver just looked at me with a puzzled look, “take the time it needs, I am not going anywhere.”   
“Okay.” Was the only thing I could say before nodding to him, swinging my handbag so that it has the function as a backpack, strapping it and headed for the front door. The door was automatic, and I walk right through to the receptionist front desk.   
“Hello. My name is Astrid Hansen and I have an appointment with the producer George Reigen.” The receptionist was a small woman, with blond hair tide up in a pigtail, glasses that filled up half her face but had lips with the same size a Kardashian. She look at me, not saying anything and that was when I noticed her headset and that she properly was in the middle of a conversation and didn’t have the time to handle a wannabe weirdo like me at the moment. She finished up her conversation with a, “Excuse me. Yes. Sorry.”. “An appointment with George Reigen?” she asked with a professional smile, while typing on her computer. I nodded, “Yes.” Then she looked at own computer, pressed a couple of time more before returning her attention back to me. “Go down the hall, turn left and then take the third door to the right.” She said while gesturing the way with her hand with the professional smile still plastered to her face. “Thank you.” I said with a big smile before leaving. Walking in the direction the receptionist instructed me I reached the third, reading George Reigen on the door label. I knocked on the on the door three times and waited with patient. Nothing happened. That was weird, didn’t he want me to meet him before I settled into my new apartment? I knocked again three times and waited. Nothing still happened. Panic started to rise in my spine, but the third time was the charm, right? I knocked again three times and then I heard fumbled inside the room and then a big dunk. I went for the door handle to see what was going on, when I heard more rumble inside the room and then the door was ripped open and I was agreed with a big man in a dirty shirt, to lose jeans, black and white hair that was everywhere, untrimmed beard and glasses that was completed smudged with something I really didn’t want to know what was. “Hello, I am Astrid Hansen. Do you know where George Reigen is?” I said with a smile. However, I could not control wrinkling my nose when the awful smell hit me right in the face. I could not determine if it was from the man or the room or maybe both. I hoped not. The man burbs while hitting right below his chest. “I am George Reigen, come on in.” and then turned around to make it able for me to enter. Of course, this was a scam! Should have known, this was to good to be true. I wanted to bang my head against the wall for my stupidity. How could I be so gullible! “Are you coming in?” George said as he sat himself down on a chair that seemed like it could break any second. “I know that it is not… perfectly maintained right now, but I haven’t slept for almost two days because I wanted to have tided up every single loose end I had before greeting you.” I first then realized how tired he sounded and if what he said was correct then how cruel wasn’t I just then. “I’m sorry if I have offended you, I was just… surprised. But I am so happy to meet you and I could understand that you had something urgent you wanted to discuss with me about before I could even settle in.” I brushed some of the old, nasty looking pizza boxes down from the opposite chair and sat down. “Yes.” George said holding his breath before continuing, “You see, this studio is not swimming with money and to be able to book a studio takes time and the good studios cost the greens.” I could not believe my ears, is he already firing me after I took this huge trip to Hollywood only to be fired! I was about to raise my voice, but it was like he could sense that I was about to yell, because he lifted his hand silencing before I made a noise and continued, “What I am trying to say is that we cannot start right away, you need to work before anything can start. I have used these two days to find a job for you and my luck didn’t strike me, before today.” He looked so happy about that statement, even though the bags under his eyes lifted and showed me crumbs of some kind of food, I did not want to determine at that moment, was. “Okay, I get that. Then I better start right away.” I said with a half-smile, half cringe at the crumbs that now started to fall from his face.   
“The job I have provided for you is simple, it is a cleaning job.” Cleaning job! Have I come to the other side of earth to clean? Sarcasm is normally my strong suit, but this guy looked to proud that it physically hurt to admit that he was not being sarcastic. Apparently, George notice my pain and continued “I know, I know that it is not the dream job. But this morning a I was out getting my coffee, when a man bumped into me and made me drop all of me coffee on myself. I yelled at him and told him that he was an idiot, when I realized that it was one of the famous actors from the upcoming superhero movies people have been so into lately.” I nodded, was still not quite sure where he was going. Was he bragging or trying to tell me something. “Anyway, he asked me how much for the coffee and for the cleaning for my shirt, when I said that I had a upcoming star myself but she needs money, if she could try working for you and do a good job then we will never speak of this again.” George started to smile proudly to himself and I could not even believe my ears. I am going to clean at a famous actor’s house! My eyes started to beam and even though I just have meet George and he have done everything to make me disgusted by him, I still wanted to kiss him. George raised his hand again and stopped me again before I even did anything. “He agreed on the term that I have to promise that it was not some crazy fan girl. Are you a crazy fan girl?” I knew George wanted me to be honest and meeting any famous people would be an incredible opportunity, however, I also need a job. “There is only one famous person in this world, I would not be able to stop being a fan girl for, the rest… I will be able to handle.” George started to nod, “okay, and who is that?”   
“J, D. He has been my childhood hero and he have helped me through some rough times.” A nostalgic memory tried to sweep into my mind, but I managed to suppress it before I could remember it.   
“Thank the heavens! Then there is nothing to worry about, you will never meet him.” George started to laugh and his laughed sounded like a castrated bear, a bit to high pitch for someone like George who also in some angles reminded me of a bear, maybe George is castrated as well, who knows, and that was why his deep voice still had a high pitch to it. “Then may I ask who it is I am going to clean at?” I asked more curious now. George laughed and inhaled at the same time making a weird broken sound, coughing and then cleared his throat. “Your employee will be Tristan Trane and his wife and two kids.” I would be lying if a wasn’t a bit disappointed, Tristan Trane is a famous and amazing actor and well known throughout the world, but he was married, so that prince charming scenario my mind started to create, was out of the question. I WILL NEVER GO AFTER MARRIED MEN. “Since that is settled. You will work for him and his family, make a good impression and do not fail me, make a mistake and lose this job and you have to consider prostitution, in secret of course, if this is the way you wanted to go.” I nodded again, thanked George for his help, before heading to the taxa. On my way-out George handed me a phone with his own contact information, Tristan Trane’s address and schedule for when my sing training will happen and when my cleaning job will begin. So far, I had a couple of days before everything began. So, on my way home to my new apartment, I slept and dreamed away into a fairy tale where buildings were made of gold, everyone who ever doubted me or treated me awfully was down on their knees begging for forgiveness. My family by my side smile and praising me for what I have accomplished, a dark spot lurking in the shadows and a mysterious man by my side. Is this an omen?


	3. Another days work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like the story and if you also like the story or are wondering about anything you are more than welcome to write a comment down below, but if the questions is about the plot or how long it will be then I cannot tell before it is done.   
> Sorry.  
> Hope you enjoy! :D

After I have used a couple of days settling down in my new apartment, I have come to the realization that this is really happening. Jumping around the apartment, cleaning it, eating dinner in my underpants, and cooking naked, which you should never do when you are frying stuff on a pan. After getting some hot oil drops on my stomach and boobs, I knew that from that moment I should wear at least a T-shirt when cooking. Until I get oil drops on my legs to. Finding stores to buy food was a harder task than I realized and getting internet took longer than anticipated. When it finally arrived together with the rest of the stuff, I have bought online on the phone George have given me, I missed having my brother. He was great building and putting stuff together and I guess I took it for granted. Because here I stand with a Wi-Fi router that looks to smart for my taste, a table, two chairs, a couch, a 1 and a half bed and a TV have to placed together by me… My so-called friends from my home always said that I was stubborn with some things, like for example doing things by myself instead of asking for help. I still do not agree with that statement, but as I stand here with all that crap, not even able to find the manual on how to build it, I started to give up and ordered take-away online just so I didn’t need to fight with cooking. After three hours trying to push pieces of the couch together by shear force, I slowly lost my will to figure it out. If these walls are not soundproof, then I must apologies to my neighbor when I meet them for all my screaming and cursing over that damn couch. When my food arrived, I decided to look for a manual online for the couch and when I finally find the recipe for my three hour’s destruction, the manual showed me, like I was some kind of idiot, that the manual on paper as well as rest of the screws and tools was down in a compartment, I easily could have found, if only I had tried. Banging my head against the wall again, disturbing my neighbor, I pieced the couch together as well as the rest of the things after my minor break down.   
What felt like an eternity later I was finally done. Everything was put together and I just had to clapped myself on the should I gave my fantasy friend a high-five, because I have cursed to much. Sleeping and being lazy came natural to me and I used the rest of my settle in days, just relaxing.   
As Monday came closer the more frighten, I became. Monday was my official workday at the Trane family, and I was so nervous that throwing up could had happened any moment. When Monday finally arrived, I took a shower two times, brushed my teeth’s three times and only ate food that didn’t leave an aftertaste and bad breath, while I shoved gum in my mouth. The Trane family was closer to my apartment than I thought, but I guess that was because of all the small narrow streets I could walk down and through speed it up. At arriving at the house, I could only feel intimidated. The gates must have been at least 4 meters tall, had a golden glare and just screamed to anyone who tried to enter that “we have money, we are important and you can never get in because we properly also have dogs that will gnaw on your bones.” Tightening my lips and straighten my back, I rang on the electronic doorbell. It rang three times before a woman’s voice answered. Her voice reminded of my own mother sweet, polite, and reminded one of the quiet and peace only nature could give you, “Hello?”   
“Ah um, hello. My name is Astrid Hansen, I am the new cleaning lady. Mr. Trane and my boss Reigen have arranged my arrival and schedule.” It was quiet at the other end of the intercom and as fear slowly creep its way into me again, the door opened, and I was letting in. As I walked towards the house, I admired the yard. These people did not hide that they had money and fame. A professional gardener was working in the yard and flower I only could imagine was there to, with a beauty that was outstanding. The one that really caught my eyes was a flower with swirling petals that from far away looked completely black with golden stripes at its outlines. But as I got closer out of curiosity, I realized that the flower was not black, but extremely dark purple and the golden stripes was on the flower was a mirage created by the water and the sun. The flower was so captivated that I didn’t even realize that a person has stopped and stood next to me. First when the person clears her throat, did I realize that I was not alone. “I’m sorry. The flower was just so beautiful that I total forgot. I’m so sorry.” She laughed and it sounded too sweet, that I was convinced that if she laughed like that every day, then the person listening to that laughed was the luckiest person in the world. She handed me her hand to greet me, “Hello, I am Elizabeth Trane, Tristan’s wife. It is my pleasure to meet you.” First then did I really get to look at her. Her looks almost brought tears to my eyes. Every aspect of her reminded me of my mother. If and angel and my mother had sex and gave birth, then she would had been that baby. Her hair was long and golden, eyes as dark blue as the deep ocean, skin perfect and clean and not even a wrinkle was in sight. If my mother went through a youth cure and everything on her got healthier and younger, then I would have been convinced they were sisters. I took her hand and shook it with a bit too much excitement, “Thank you so much, I have been so pleased when I heard that you and your family was willing to give me a chance to show that I am reliable. You can count on me!” I was to excite, even I knew that. But she just laughed and welcomed me into her house. “As you properly know, it is me and my husband and our two kids, which lives here. Your will primarily only be inside and do the cleaning and we will pay the amount, which took you to do the chores. We already have a gardener and a cook and only recently have we fired our last maid because of… complications.” Even a dumb, dumb like me had an idea of what these “complications” meant, and my goal is that I will not be fired because of these “complications”. I nodded at her in agreement to what she just had said. She smiled at me again and continued further into the house. My guess was that I should properly follow. After we got through the main area, we entered the living room, which was four times bigger than my own apartment, but my apartment was also rather small, so. “This is my husband Tristan Trane, he will only be here today. He is starting a new job, but we cannot really say what that is out of security reasons.”   
“I understand!” I hurried blurred out, “There are no reason to explain, it is completely understandable, if I was in your position, I would have done the same.” I said with a big smile on my face, “or I mean. I will never be in that position, but I can imagine. But not in the wrong way!” I panicked totally now, I didn’t want to be impolite or go over to the “complication” category, but somehow, I felt that the whole time I tried to come out of the hole I suddenly dug myself deeper in it. Both of them stared at me now, and I was sure that my face was completely red from embarrassment.   
“I knew that this would happen.” Mr. Trane said as he shook on his head, “we cannot hire people from the outside and hope that they will accept that they only have to do a job. They always wish for more.” Elizabeth was just about to answer her husband when I blurred again without thinking “Do not worry about me! Only J. D. can make me into a fan girl!” I said. I breathed to hard, it felt like I had walk a marathon, but I continued “I will do my work properly, I only wish for a job, and I will prove my worth!” As the last words left my mouth, both of them looked stunned at me and I could not determine whether that was good or not. Then luckily Elizabeth started to laugh, but Tristan still looked stunned by my words. Only then did I get to take a proper look at Tristan Trane. He is just a handsome in real life as in the film industry, guess beauty cannot be faked. He was tall, clearly muscular, but not over the top at all. His hair was dark golden as always and I could never determine which color his eyes was. Sometimes they were dark and sometimes bright and other times they are a mix between blue and green. His eyes, as well as his acting skills was what he was most know for. Just like my favorite actor J.D. he was able to play any part. He could be the villain one day and then the hero the next. His looks could always be matched with any character no matter background. Lately he had been part of a lot of action and fantasy films preforming each role with the outmost conviction and truth to his character. He really was a impressive man when it came to acting, but the man in front of me is not the actor I should admire but husband to Elizabeth and my boss and if proving my worth to him is what I have to do to fulfill my goal, then so be it. I then glared at him, trying to prove that I was not interested in him in anyway crazy fan girls would. And when I started to glare his face changed from stunned into stern. “Okay, you may prove your worth. But if you give me a reason to fire you then I will.” He said, just as stern as his face before storming out of the room. Elizabeth was now chuckling, then she looked at me “I guess there is a first for everything.” She clapped my shoulder, and pride rise in my chest, but I needed to be sure. “So those that mean I can start working?” Elizabeth turn towards me with an innocent smile, “Sure, let’s give it a go.”. At the start of the cleaning, I truly believe at one point that this house generated more rooms. It felt like I cleaned a room and two more room got generated right before my eyes. Cleaning this whole house would take a day, I am not even exaggerating. When darkness started to cover the sky and the night crept in, I could final whip my forehead and exhale victorious. As I placed the cleaning equipment back to their original spot, which took forever to find, Elizabeth came into my field of view. “Good work today, you have truly impressed me.”   
“Thank you. I guess it took a bit longer than anticipated. But if you both are pleased with my work, I will try to do an even better job, if that is even possible.” I gave Elizabeth a big smile and prayed on the inside that I could continue. She just looked plain at me and my mind was already drifting towards the outcome of this conversation. It would have made sense, she nice, she properly fired so many people that she properly could get money for it now. “I want you to stay. I like your spirit and your energy. And on the plus side for me, I also find you funny. I think you will be a great asset.”  
“Thank you so much, I do not even know what to say. Is this also okay for Mr. Trane?”   
“Do not worry, he is never home anyway, so it will be me you are mainly dealing with. I do not hope that it will be an issue, would it?” She looked it me suspiciously now. I do not hope that she thinks I would be disappointed if he was not around. On the contrary, having less people to deal with, the better.   
“I am more than happy being with you ma’am. I hope I will be just what you have hoped for.” I answered he question with a smile. She smiled back, handed me and envelope before showing me to the door and wish a safe trip home, telling me to come next Monday, before closing the door. With the envelope in my hand I started walking home. I weird first start on the job, even for a weirdo like me, I do not hope that if I become famous and need the same help as they do become so ill trusted towards other human beings. That would only be sad. As I walked home, I sent a text to my mother and siblings in hope that they would be able to keep me company before I return home and go to bed after such a long day. But I never received any texts from them. Weird.


	4. I guess I have to be carefull

After a couple of months working for the Trane family, did I realize something about them and myself. Mr. Trane is a workaholic and is rarely home. The two children Luke and Sophie have school and friends and are pretty outgoing. They are young teenagers and are not often home, only when they have to like be home for dinner. Miss Trane seems like a lonely person. She is only leaving the house for special occasions like events, where she has to portray like the perfect wife and when she has some of the other housewives over for a ladies’ talk and drinks. I feel blessed when she is together with me and we often talk about everything and nothing. When we are together, I sense that she can be herself, compared to when she is at the event or together with the other housewives. She acts like a rich, spoiled wife when she is with those witches, but with me she laughs and jokes a lot which I find awesome.   
“So, Astrid, how is it going with the music and your singing career?”  
“It’s going fine. Not as fast as I wanted it to, but I, of course, have to pay for the lessons and studio time with my own pocket money and so far I am only working here every Monday. I guess it is just not enough, so I have been looking for some more work.” I answered with a sweet, innocent smile to not concern Elizabeth. However, it failed because she started to look sad and concern for me.   
“If only there was something I could do?” Elizabeth said with now a more concerned look and sad. She started to look around like the answer were somewhere in the room. Before I could come up with a following comment on it, her face started to brighten up and she started to walk towards me. She looked like a bull ready to charge at me, which scared the living pants of me.   
“I know! House maids and good ones are so hard and rare to find. What if I ask Tristan to put in a good word for you at his new job? Maybe, one of his fellow actors or actresses could be interested in having a maid, which can help with the cleaning and whom is not a crazy person.” When she said crazy person, I could not stop myself from twisting my lips a little. If only she knew. I may not be a crazy fan girl, but only an insane person in a straight jacket would call me normal.  
She totally ignored my twitting and just continuing rambling on “It could be great! I could give you an extra day here at my house, which could give you the double amount of what you are earning right now and then you could work at one more place maybe one or two more times. It would almost be fulltime job.” She was so happy and proud by her discovery and conclusion, that I knew rejecting it or say that it would properly not be a good idea seemed to be to offensive. She was just trying to help. And if it actually worked, then I guess she was right. And if my new “boss” was an asshole I could always quit for the “complication” section. I nodded with glee to her and she started jumping and dancing. She truly was a funny and lovely person when it was just me and her.   
Coming home from a long day of cleaning, jumping, and dancing with Elizabeth, I threw myself on the couch and didn’t even manage to start counting sheep before I fell asleep. I woke up to the magical sound of messengers’ ringtone. I looked at the screen and noticed that it was my mother who was calling. I immediately sat up straight fumbling through all my stuff I had thrown around before finding my headphones connecting them as I accepted the call.   
“Hi mom! How is going?” my mother sat at the other end, to close to the camera, so only half her face was showed and a pimple was just starring at me like it was a newly created third eye. Cringing my face, my mother discovered that she was to close and finally leaned back so that even the pimple’s staring at me got less visible, “Hi sweety, it is going get! What about you?”  
“It is going fine, getting a lot for stuff done.” I said with a comforting smile.   
“I am so glad to hear that, have you come far in your music production? When will you let me listen to one of your songs?”   
“It takes to finalize each song, but do not worry mother, you will be the first in my line to listen to it.”   
“I expect nothing else, but I do hope that when you publishing your music and I will get it for free.”  
I gave her a sarcastic laugh.  
“You weren’t doing anything than the music stuff, right?” She asked with a concerned look on her face.  
“Of course not mother! Everything is going smoothly, and it is only a matter of time now.” My family and definitely my mother did not know about my struggles and money issue. I knew deep in my heart that my family would not judge me for working to get what I wanted. We have always done that in my family, my mother often said when we wanted things that “You can only get luxury, if you work hard.”. But I also knew that if I truly needed her help, then she would give it to me in a heartbeat. But my family do not have the money for that and concerning her with my issues have never been my greatest joy. But I know I could do this, so why concern her with my problems?   
“So… How are Lea and Louis?”   
“Well… Before you left your sister had that enormous fight with her boyfriend. You remember, right?”  
“Yeah, I remember.”   
“Well… Lea confronted him about his spends and he said that it was none of her concern he could use the money on whether he wanted. EVEN on OTHER WOMEN!”  
My mother’s voice started to become more furious and she started to jump everytime she almost screamed into the screen.  
“You must be kidding?”  
“I am not, Astrid! Not only did he use all of his own money, but also Lea’s money. And now they are both in debt because of his spends! I told her. Throw him into the sea and let him drown, claim his inheritance and hope to God that you will not get busted to get out of that mess.”  
“Now I really hope you are kidding, do not give her ideas, you know that if she is pushed enough she would properly do it!” I was really hoping that no one heard or recorded me and my mother’s conversation right now, because if he died then even, I could go to jail.  
“Well you are allowed to dream. But at least Lea is out of that relationship, she still has her job and maybe one day she will meet a proper man who will take care of her. Right now, I am trying to do what I can to convince the police and the court that her former boyfriend was a thief and he should pay the whole debt himself, and even pay back the money he had taken from her. But such things take time.”  
“Yeah, I guess, crazy. But I am glad that you are helping her, I should properly write or call her later to hear how she is doing.” I was not surprised that my mother did everything in her power to help my sister. Family comes first was her motto, and she always knew what to do even at the weirdest situations and she always placed a moral onto of your head as a form of reminder. And if you forgot the moral, she will be the cruel one to tell everyone she meets about it, until you had learned you lesson. Even to this day I still hear her tell the story about when I was young and wanted to play hooky and skip PE. I logged into her parent account, wrote to my teacher that I was down with an illness and could not attend the class and then skipped it together with my best friend at the time. I, of course, overlooked that the teacher wrote an answer back as a form of confirmation, which my mother saw, and she mentally destroyed me a whole day and even gave me house arrest for my little prank. Urg… She is to serious sometimes. But I understand it now, I just still do not understand the moral completely she gave me at that time. “You have to be sharper than a knife to fool me.” Or maybe she just did not have any moral for me. Who knows?   
“Then what about Louis? Have he and his girlfriend gotten any luck becoming pregnant?”   
“That’s right, you do not know! Two weeks ago, Katherine told the whole family that they were expecting, but that they were still in the first semester of the pregnancy, so we have to be patient.”  
“Really! Amazing I am going to become an aunt!”  
“And I a grandmother!”  
“That means that you are finally old, mom!” laughter started to erupt between me and my mother.  
“Don’t go there yet, for you guys I will always be twenty-lying and I will convince my grandson the same.”  
“Woaw, that statement do not work on any of us anymore, mother. But glad that you are still convinced otherwise!” I said laughing together with my mother. It has surely been a long time since I had talked with her like this. It removes all my concerns and problems. Money issue? What is that? Not even started recording music, yet? Do not even know what you are talking about! None of those things exist when I am talking and laughing with her. That is truly amazing.   
“Oh Astrid. I am so proud of you and I cannot express how thrilled I am at seeing you become a great and amazing person. Just remember. We are still family, so do not forget us.” When she said that, I became straight back to reality. My biggest fear was that they would forget me because I was here, but I guess that they feared the same too.   
“I promise you. I will never forget any of you. You three + 2 are my family and family sticks together, right?”  
“That is what I always have said” my mother answered before chuckling for herself. Giving her a smile a knew that as long as we keep the contact and I keep this as a secret, for now from her, then she can be happy and proud of my development and journey.   
We continued talking about the past, before I left for Hollywood and remembering the past made me a bit homesick. Maybe talking with her and remembering the past brought that back in me. I guess I have to be careful about that.


	5. Be patient, my dear.

I have now been in Hollywood for almost five months, which is crazy. Talking with my family once a month was all I could handle when I swung between work and singing training. George had told me that when this month was over, we could finally start recording. I am so excited! Elizabeth and I had become even closer, if that was even possible, we drink tea and coffee together before and after my cleaning job at her house. Some of the time she even walks around with me cracking jokes and tell funny stories about her life before she met her husband, Tristan. She told me that when he was an upcoming star, she herself, was a crazy fan girl and went to every conference he participated to. She told me that after the eight conference she manage to get his attention and they started to talk, but it took him ages to ask her out, so she took the matters into her own hands and asked him out to coffee. They got closer and after a couple of YEARS, they finally got official and few years after that married and had kids. It was a sweet and innocent story, as far as the public knows, but some of the things she had done to gain his attention was insane. She had once stalked him after a conference, followed him to his house and stared at him through the window while taking notes on which subjects, she could talk with him about, when they finally would talk. And the worse part was that even to this day he still didn’t know that she had done it. She looked so relieved, like a weight had been lifted from her shoulders when she told me, and she confessed that she was not proud of it. But people do crazy things when they are in love. I promised her that I would not tell a soul about her story. I am still not. Shhh…   
While I was cleaning, Elizabeth danced elegantly towards me with a big goofy smile on her face. I could not prevent from smiling myself when I noticed her. “I have good news.” She almost sang while continuing dancing now around me, while I dusted off their old books in the library. “Okay, will you share them with me?”  
“Maybe…” She said teasing and now swinging her slender hips form side to side.  
“Please?”   
“Okay! You convinced me! Stop nagging!” she almost yelling, like I had done something bad. Giving her an apologetic look, she continued, “You remember I told you that I will ask Tristan if he could help you getting some more work and guess what! It worked!” She threw her arms into air in a form of victorious stand, before slapping the full force down into my shoulders. Staggering from the blow and also became a bit scared of the unbelievable strength and whined with pain and pleasure.   
“You have to be lying!” I yelled back. She shook her head still smiling and didn’t mind that now I was yelling to.  
“It’s true. Have you heard the name Edward Smith before?” frowning at her question and gave myself some time to think. The name sounded familiar, but I just couldn’t put my finger on it.   
“Damn you are slow!” She then yelled even louder and a bit annoyed, “That TV show which ended two years ago, called “if it was only me?” where my husband also featured in as a guest star, the main character of the show? Does it ring any bell?” I really did not want to tell hear that I only watched reality programs and superhero movies, which because of them was the only reason I even knew her husband. So, I decided to nod like now a dumb, dumb. Because she saw right through me “You’re lying! Have you been living under a rock in your entire life and have first decided now to explore past your doorframe?” She sounded frustrated and I couldn’t blame her. “I just haven’t been that interested into that kind of films and TV-series. Sorry.” She then released a sigh and then started to pat my shoulders all concerning like she was comforting me. I pressed my lips into a tight line as her face looked saddened “You poor thing…” She was totally screwing with me, it didn’t even need to be an expert to notice that.  
“Well, then thank God you have me. We can start watching some more films and series. We could even start with “if it was only me?”, so that you could see who your new boss would be and spends some quality time together, you and me. Normally I love spending time with her, but now she was stretching it.   
“I actually would prefer meeting him first, before watching the TV-series, so I could get to know him and not confuse him with the character from the series.”   
“I understand, then let do that and then watch. I actually really like that series and he really is a cutie.” She continued rubbing my shoulder, but now she was smiling, so I guess it was okay. I finished up my cleaning and we drank some coffee and tea. She even gave me some cookies, she had made the other day. The madeleine cookies, she had made, was fluffy and lighter than air and the taste still lingered on my tongue after I had finished one. After a short while even Tristan came home. Even I didn’t see that coming and Elizabeth look just or maybe even more surprised.   
“Tristan? I thought you would first come home tomorrow evening?” she started to walk towards him while containing a concerned look on her face. Tristan was not an open book, I could not tell whether he was happy, sad, angry, or even horny. Nothing. I am not fan of that.  
“Everything went according to plan and we manage to finish up earlier than expected.” He just said, kissing her on the lips as a form of greeting before noticing I still was there. He looked at me, glaring as always, and shifted his look back towards Elizabeth. Me and Tristan are just not able to click, and I know for a certainty that he is only allowing me to continue my work here and helping me finding more work, because of Elizabeth and maybe also in a hope of getting rid of me. I do not blame him. I enjoy his company a lot more when he is not there. Then it is like talking to nothing, which it normally is, but I at least get rid of the glaring part. After he had whispered something to Elizabeth, properly a curse or an evil spell, he turns to me. “I do not know whether Beth have told you, but a coworker of mine was looking for a cleaning lady, like you, but he didn’t have the time to look for one nor interview one, so I recommended you.”  
“I have already told her and she accepts.” Elizabeth said while clapping her hands with a big grin. He looked at her, then at me, and then back at her, “That settles it then. I will call him right away, so we can arrange a day you can meet him and start up. Cleaning lady.” I just know, that he was placed into this world just to annoy me. He is the type of person I would had ignored, maybe even do an evil prank on, just because I could. But since he technically my employer and Elizabeth’s husband. Damn it, Elizabeth. I guess I just have to chew into the sour apple and give him the most force smile of the history of forced smiles.   
Tristan left the room to make the phone call and that was when Elizabeth came slightly jumping back to me.   
“He is calling him right now, aren’t you excited! You finally get another job, just like you wanted and then have even more money for your recording and singing lessons.” I guess Elizabeth was right. Tristan had done me a huge favor and there was properly nothing in this world I could give in return, that wouldn’t either damage my wallet or myself. After a short while Tristan came back and actually had a small smile on his lips. Maybe God do exist. Or maybe he had planned something evil. Who knows? “I have just been on the phone with Edward and he was asking if you could already come tomorrow.” His smile grew wider, which only scared me even more. “thank you, that was really nice of you to do.” I said back to him. He looked surprised, like I didn’t even know how to thank people. But his smile remained. Maybe we could be friends, me and him, in another parallel universe, of course, but it was still nice to see him smile. He is much handsomer when he smiles like that. “Then let me give you his contact information and address. If you could show up tomorrow before 10 am, then he should still be home.” He sent me Edward’s contact information and Elizabeth just sat quietly, exchanging her looks between me and Tristan. When Tristan placed his phones in his pocket Elizabeth started to talk. “Well isn’t this great! My two-favorite people in one room, helping each other.” Her smile was so wide that I could see every single one of her teeth and if I squinted my eyes together, I could properly even count them all. “Astrid. Why do you not stay for dinner, I am sure Tristan wouldn’t mind.” Tristan’s face fell on the ground and if Elizabeth wasn’t looking so happy, I would have laughed my ass of because of how the color on Tristan’s face fell. But I wasn’t ready to be that much involved with the family and I certainly wouldn’t want to meet their kids, cause they sounded even worse than Tristan. So, I politely declined and told her by lying that I had some unfinished at home that I had to attend to. When I said that some color returned back to Tristan’s face and he even nodded at me as a form of “thanks” before leaving the room. Elizabeth didn’t take my decline that well and kept nagging about what I had at home that was so important. I told her that I was working on a song, which also had to be done tomorrow, so I was a bit behind schedule and hoped she understood. My lie. She still did not look happy, but she eventually agreed and made me promise her that I would join next time. I promised her multiple times, as she walked me to the door, handing me the envelope with the cash for my days work and kissed me farewell on the cheek before letting me go.   
On my way home I google searched Edward Smith and even looked at the reviews from the TV-series. He was quite handsome, not really the type of guy I would normally go after, so no concern in that apartment, but handsome indeed. But pictures could always deceive a person and most of the time you would never truly know the story behind just a picture. I would know. My mother showed me a picture when I was young, with me, my father and her. She told me that on the day, when the picture got taken, my father had just announced that if she didn’t give me up for adoption, because of money problems and he would divorce her and never have anything to do with nether me or my other siblings. She said that she would rather divorce him and give me up for adoption because I was her flesh and blood and family was everything. So that what happened, on the very same day I was born, my father handed my mother divorce papers. I have only seen him twice in my whole life and out meetings had always been awkward and we only meet each other of a special occasion. The first time was when my big sister Lea had her confirmation dinner and I didn’t know who he was before my uncle introduced him to me. Even my father didn’t know who I was and he also, at that time, didn’t seem to care. The second time was a year before my journey to Hollywood. My brother had just gotten married to Kathrine and he was invited because he was the biological father to the groom. My mother never talked to him, even when the sat right next to each other. And the second most dreading picture that had ever been taken where he and I were present in it was the family picture at the wedding. We all were smiling, but it was easy to tell that no one felt comfortable in the moment. He and I only greeted and bade farewell to each other at the start and end of the wedding. And then that was it. I am not really sad about it anymore. When I was a child I often asked my mother “Why don’t he want me?” and even though it hurt my mother to talk about him, she still did her best “he just do not know, what kind of amazing person you are and that is his lost.” I love my mother and when I one day get married, I hope that she, Lea and Louis will walk me down the aisle, but mostly her. And if I get a husband that even thinks that the father is the only one who should walk you down the aisle, then he is not the right person for me. But with my luck in men I would properly die alone being eaten by all of my cats, like a juicy snack. But like my mother also often say “Good things happens to those who wait.” Or maybe that was someone else. I’m so confused.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so into this story and I have not been able to put it down. I hope you enjoy it, because I sure enjoy writing it.   
> Thanks again.


	6. complications?

Waking up at 6 am, I knew that I just hated myself just a bit more than I should. My head was sleeping, but apparently my body was wide awake. Stupid body. As fear and dread started to wash over me, I slapped myself in the face to wake up properly. Putting on some efficient clothing, brewing my very cheap instant coffee. It sucks compared to Elizabeth freshly brewed coffee, but I am poor, so judge me later. This time I only took one shower and brushed my teeth twice before heading out of the door. Maybe being with Tristan, Elizabeth and the annoying kids helped me being more relaxed. I can only hope so. As I followed the GPS on my phone to Edward Smith’s house, I could sense the fear again. What if he sees me and will be like “Be gone from me mortal! You may not pass! Why are your ass the same size as a barn door!” Urg… just the thought itself demotivate me. As my steeps felt heavier and the road longer, I was on the brink to write to him, telling him that I have become sick with a virus and it could not be contained. But then again. What if he is just like how the public sees him? A good, nice decent guy. Yeah right. If Tristan was even remotely closer to how the public viewed him, then he and I would not have a starring contest each and every fucking time we meet. This anticipation scares me and I do not know if I can hold on much longer.  
Just as I had finally agreed with myself to give up and just turn back to the safety of my own little apartment with all of my farts hanging around, the GPS beeped stating I had arrived. Great. His house was more modernized than the Trane’s family house, but the gate was still there. As I rang on the doorbell, I had this flashback back to when I first time rang on the doorbell to the Trane’s house and how scared and nervous, I was of failing and being rejected. Let’s hope I will do it even better this time. No one answered and after a while of waiting, I rang again. Nothing. Is this a famous people problem. The Trane’s family did the exact same thing! Well here comes my wonderful quality! I am a stubborn piece of poop and I will keep ringing until your eardrum’s pops. I spammed the doorbell. And when no sound came anymore, I was certain that I broke it. That was when I heard an annoyed voiced on the other side of the intercom. “What? I do not buy at the door.” Frowning my eyebrows at that statement I answered “Is this Edward Smith, I am the… cleaning lady from the Trane family household. May I come in.” Calling myself a cleaning lady was still not my thing and if George even think about making that my stage name, I will make sure no one finds his body. I will just bury his body in his own pill of pizza boxes and the smell he has created himself should cover the smell of a rotting corpse. No problem.   
I heard the magical sound of a buzzing, thinking that it was the door. I opened it and walk up to the door. He did not have the same amazing garden as the Trane family had. He had sculptures instead and I guess that is easier to attend to then plants and beautiful flowers. A bit disappointing, this house looks like the typical man cave and the incredible touch of a woman was not in sight. Sighing to myself, I bang on the door, expecting that I should wait forever again for it to open, but to my surprise it got opened right away. And there he stood the man from my google searching, just as handsome and beautiful as the guy in the pictures. Annoying. There was nothing. His skin was just as pretty as Elizabeth’s skin, but instead of that white fairy skin like her, his reminded me more of a shining alabaster skin. Not even a pimple in sight. Sad. His eyes dark chocolate brown that could make every girl sway and kiss his feet as they were drowning in them. High cheek bones and slender. He was even taller than me, but I guess that was not a surprise since I am not the tallest creature you will find, but this was just ridiculous. I reached to his chest. More annoyed now. His hair looked fluffy and had the same color as his eyes and the fluffiness could I only compare to the madeleine cookies Elizabeth gave me yesterday. Ah their taste is still on my tongue, mix together with my own really bad instant coffee. He looked like he was about to leave, but he stepped to the side with his long, stupide slender legs, welcoming me inside. I stepped inside, nodding to him as a form of greeting. Perfect people sure are annoying, but I shouldn’t judge him just yet. “About time you arrived. I am a bit busy so I will make this short. I want you to come every Tuesday and Friday if possible. Just standard cleaning, I do not know where everything is and I had to fire the last maid because of… “complications”.” Man… this conversation feels like a déjà vu. Maybe his version of “complications” was the same as Elizabeth’s version of “complications”, which I guess correctly, by the way. Well not the extreme parts of it, but most of it. When I had worked for the Trane family for two months and Elizabeth and myself were getting on good terms, I finally asked her what she meant by “complications”. She told me, that the former maid was a young girl from a poor family, and they hired out of pity, but she was excellent at her job. After she had worked there for two years the family realized that she had stolen a bunch of used underwear from Tristan. She had kept some herself and sold some of them online, to get even more money. Then she had hidden most of the children’s toys and burned Elizabeth clothes. When they confronted her, she denied at first, but after they reported it, she confessed and even threaten to take her own life if Tristan didn’t become hers. He, of course, refused her and she was arrested. But before they had gotten completely rid of her, she had sent insane love letters to him with blood all over it. God knows where that blood came from. And the last they had heard from her was a goodbye letter contain one of her fingers. Crazy right! Even a straight jacket would not have been enough for this poor girl. Oh, right before I forget. Elizabeth told me not to share that either, so… shhh…   
“I understand. I am not able to work on Fridays, but if it was okay with you, I wouldn’t mind doing it on Saturdays instead.”. Edward nodded while looking away on something I didn’t know what was “Well, then please do it in the morning hours and be done before 8pm. I normally arrange parties Saturdays and I guess it wouldn’t be bad to have a freshly cleaned house before my guests arrives.” Now I was the one nodding and gave him and innocent smile “Great. I can start right away. Do not mind me.”   
“If you say so. Here are the spare keys. Guard them with your life and the code to the gate is 1937. Just let yourself in because I hate being the one answering the door.” Well, now I’m surprised, because you seemed so jolly when I rang on the doorbell. God, if these people could read my mind, then I would have been slaughtered a long time ago. “I get that. And please if you are concerned about anything or have questions, please do not whole back, because I am here to help you.” I uphold my fake innocent, professional smile, and thank God it worked because he smiled back and went upstairs like he already had forgotten all about my existence. Well, I am only happy that he is not someone who is breathing down my neck, commenting me about every single little thing, I do. Some people find my method of cleaning controversial when they she me clean, but no one had ever said that the result bad. Quite the opposite exactly. And I hate explaining everything I do on the way, because no one really gets it and let’s be honest, in the end no one really care. I placed my phone in my pocket. Had still not realized that I was holding it in my hand. What a dumb, dumb. And my search began. It took me a whole hour figuring out the house and finding every cleaning supply. Luckily the former cleaning lady had left all the products and there seemed to be enough as a start. I started tidying up the place. The kitchen was a nightmare, but even the kitchen was bigger than my apartment, which if I haven’t told is only 20 square meters, pots and pans everywhere together with different kinds of beverage that had the lingering smell of old, warm and sticky alcohol. Disgusting. He even had a bar. A BAR! It’s just not fair. The living room was joined with the kitchen creating a big room, perfect for partying. A big ass bathroom on the lower floor with a spa tub fitting for three big people like me. Upstairs he had two guest rooms with a five-star hotel vibe over it, a big ass bathroom again with even more crazy stuff and some of it, was I not even sure what it was used for. And then the master bedroom, which was properly his bedroom with a balcony which has a view over a big park where people rarely are cause it was permanently closed for some weird reason, I didn’t want to know. Where he had disappeared to, I was not quite sure there was properly rooms I haven’t even discovered yet or maybe a secret one where a keeps people prisoned, just for fun. I just hope I did not have to clean that dungeon. After a couple of hours, did the place start to look nice. Things were removed, had even manage the dusting and spider-web murdering. It was starting to look up for this good, old girl. Vacuuming was a piece of pie, he didn’t practice buying all those weird ass things like pots, plants and sculptures everywhere like Elizabeth. Which is the main reason why it takes forever to clean. As I started to wash the floor, a big dunk came from upstairs. Before I realized what, I was doing I ran for the stairs and tried to listen to where the sound came from. I heard some swearing down the hall and followed the noise. As I opened the door, I say Edward was clenching his hand with his other hand and blood was visible for the eye. I rushed to him with frowned brows and concerned look “What happened? Are you okay?”  
“I’m fine, just go back to whatever you were doing.” He said annoyed and then stood up. I looked around the room and noticed that this was some kind of gym. Damn, I properly had to clean this room to and now with blood in it to. I breathed out an annoyed huff, before standing up myself. “You need to get that cleaned, it will not be pleasant if it gets infected!” I said, showing that I was annoyed but mostly concerned. When though I am the youngest of my siblings, I was still the one being most careful. I had never broken anything in my life and if I ever started to bleed, I would clean it nicely and patch it up. One time when I was a teen, my friend cut the palm of his hand and blood started to go everywhere. I got so concerned for him, that I dragged him into my mother’s kitchen washed it and cleaned it up afterwards before banding it in. My friend had kept protesting, stating that I did not have to be so concerned. But that just who I am. It did not matter to me whether I knew who you were or not I would help you if you got hurt. My sister, Lea, said that it was a fine quality to have, but I must be careful because I could offend people. My only question is then… Who the bib, would get offend getting help? She was never able to answer my questions and the only answer that had worked for me, was that I damaged their pride in the progress of helping them. Well, buh hu…  
I dragged Edward downstairs, held his hand under the running water as I searched through every compartment for bandage and disinfection supplies. You would have thought that rich people would have that, but no. After the fifth compartment I gave up, looking through my own stuff and found a roll of bandage for bandaging up a wound. Why I have that, because I normally the clumsy person, but yeah. I was surprisingly quite throughout my frenzy and haven’t said a word since I practically yelled at him. He is properly dumbfounded which is fine by me. I hope he stays that way until I am done. I took his hand in my and tried to see if there were anything visible that needed to be removed before bandaged it up. As I took a closer look, I could see a small piece of glass sitting there. I started the water again, moved his hand under it, and looked through my small bag for a set of tweezers. When I found, I took his hand again, turned off the water and tried slowly to pull the small piece of glass out of the wound. That was when he woke up from whatever trance he was in an gave me a scared and concerned look, “do you even know what you are doing?” He asked me. I gave him a small nod while I concentrated on my work. I pulled the glass out with a steady hand, and luckily it was a small piece. But it had to be removed before I could bandage up the wound. I washed his hand again, a bit angry about not being able to find my disinfection, dried of his hand before bandaging it up. After I was done, I gave him a proud look, but his face was emotionless. He looked at my masterpiece, according to myself of course, then up at me. I still gleamed with pride, but he just kept silence. After a short while of awkward silence, he finally thanked me with a small nod. I was expecting a “thank you” with words or “You are so amazing! I would never had known what to do if you weren’t here!” with stars jumping out of his eyes. The fantasy itself made me giggle creepy. He then left me to my own fantasy and first when I heard the loud bang from a door being closed so hard that it had I woke me up, did I come back to my reality.   
Hmm… maybe I hurt his pride?


	7. Listen now!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not as long as some of the other chapters, but there is a heartfelt moment. Please, don't hate.  
> Thanks :D

My first recording day, yaaah! Recording a song, you yourself have created and then recorded give you a feeling which is indescribable. I never thought that this day would come. After I was closing in on my seventh month being here in Hollywood, I had slowly started to give up on ever start the recording. Yeah, yeah, I had a lot of singing practices and yeah, yeah, George promised me that when we were closing into the 6th month things will start to changes. But believe me, George is a great guy, but he still looks like a homeless man. I realized after I got to know him better that he always looked like that, and even though I thought I met him at a dying state, I came to the conclusion that he always looks dying. He was always dirty and one day when I entered his office, he was lying so still on his desk that I really thought that that was it. The end of his life and my career, until I got closer and noticed he was just sleeping while eating a pizza slice that should had been thrown out ages ago. I am not kidding, when I left him for his sleeping and truly hoped that the thing that started to move under one of the pizza boxes was just a fig of my imagination. I definitely did not want to see who he was sharing his office with.   
The driver, Lucas apparently, was George’s close friend and he had helped him out a lot. Mainly his help has been getting George to and from the studio and his office. Lucas is a great man and once I got to know him better, he had a humor I could die for. He is very polite and introverted when you meet him, and guess he still is. He is not much of a talker and he enjoys his peace and quiet when he gets it. He has wrinkles all over his face and most of the time you cannot see his eyes, because the wrinkles almost cover them completely. His hair is close to be complete white and only a few strands of hair on his head are still black. He his more muscular than he looks, and he had carried boxes filled with instruments and notes from the studio to the car with breaking a sweat. He is impressive. His humor is outdated, but since I came here, I had not met a single person cracking his types of jokes. He is pretty fond of dad jokes and since I never really had a real father, I then had never heard these types of jokes before. Not really. One day he was picking me up from my apartment in his taxa car. As I got into the car, he had this poker face on him. After we started to roll out into the traffic did he start to talk “What did one of the but cheek’s say to the other but cheek?” he started out of the blue, I didn’t know how to react and looked at him dumbfounded, “why are we so divided?”, I could not stop my upcoming chuckles and then he continued “Maybe because there is so much shit between us.” I cracked up and the worse part was that he still maintained his poker face. I kept laughing throughout the car ride until we reached the studio. Then he gave me a smile and said, “you seemed like someone who needed a good, old laugh.” I was not sure why he had said that, but I thanked him anyway and walked inside while waving.  
Anyway back to the story. So, I recorded my new song named “that little pain”. The song was a combination of rock and sentimental and it took me hours to finish. George may look like a homeless man, but he knew what he was doing. He was great at instructing me when I needed to have power and when I needed to slow down. Hitting the high notes was complicated at times, but we managed it in the end. After I finished up, I grabbed a cup of coffee together with George in one of the local cafés. He told me what I needed to improve till next time and that my next song shouldn’t be so depressing, but this song was fine for now. Now the rest of it was up to him and the other producer and mixer to finalize and I should clap myself on the shoulder for this. He told me that we should next time get back up singers to my song, because that could make my song even more powerful, and that the greatest songs always had more than one voice occurring in them. I understood what he said, but getting back up singers will cost even more money, and where in the loving hell will I get that? He said that he would look into it, while brushing crumbs of his wrinkled shirt, which wasn’t supposed to be there since we didn’t had anything to eat. I thanked him for his help, and we parted ways. We agreed that I will continue my training and keep working hard so we had money to shop for. Dirty, old geezer using my precious money. Sob, sob. But I guess it must be done.   
Monday came around and my work at the Trane family was about to start. I had expected that it was only me and Elizabeth who would be there, like always, but to my great surprise the whole Trane family was present. As I entered the house, I was greeted by Elizabeth as always, she smiled and kissed me on the cheek rushing me inside. “What going on?” I just had to ask, because she was more energetic than usual and if Tristan and the kids were also there, then the world’s end must be nearing.   
“Tristan told me that you had recorded your very first song today!” She said gleaming and shining so bright that my eyes started to melt into its own sockets.   
“How did you guys know?” I managed to say, as I slowly burned from the brightness.   
“George told me.” Tristan started to say and he was about to continue when Elizabeth stopped him with her own words “George sent a copy of your song, I know that it hadn’t been edited yet, but I just had to hear, but then I came up with an even greater idea!” Oh no.   
“Why don’t you sing it for us?”  
“Ummm…” was the only sound I could make. I had sung in front of family and friends before and I also sang in front of George and the rest of the crew, but this was different. Elizabeth was like a mother and a best friend to me and I wouldn’t mind singing for her, the issue was the three others of this household. I continued making weird sounds when Luke started to talk. Well, whether he talked to me or someone on his phone was still the question, but the boy talked “Man, this suck.” It was not the best sentences, but he proved that he still was able to talk. Sophie was also busier rolling her eyes and taking pictures on her phones than care about her mother’s frenzies. That was when Tristan started to talk again. “Every great performer mut be able to do at least this. If you wanted to become known for your music, then you must practice on singing in front of other people, even people who will either not care or even hate it.” Tristan didn’t look at me with anger or disgust but had more the face of a teacher. What he said was harsh, but I knew he was right. Those petty thoughts I had would not work in the real world and definitely not in the entertainment business. When it came it entertaining then Tristan was the master and I was his humble follower. No matter how much I hate I have convinced me and Tristan share between us, he still finds ways to impress me and sometimes even convince that maybe it’s all in my head. “But if you are not able to do it I cannot blame you. Guess you aren’t professional.” He then said making a shrug of the shoulders and looked away with a disappointed look. Okay forget what I said, I hate that guy, and if it is a fight I wants then, bring it on!  
I walked into the middle of the room and then I just sang.  
Traveled to, the sun  
As warm started to burn my hate gone  
You just watch, the whole way  
Why must you be in my head?  
I can hear your voice, even when I close my eyes.  
That little pain is tormenting me  
Listen now!  
I was here waiting for you,   
Even though my dreams were far further today.  
I am still here waiting for you,  
Keep on dreaming  
But I am sure that by heart is pulling, on the string that connect us, so  
That girl you meet back then whole had opened her eyes  
Why do, you cry?  
I walked in, to silences  
And I am sure I could hear you if tried harder  
But you are, so far away  
Why do you, keep on disappearing?  
I could still hear your voice  
Even when I tried screaming  
That little pain is loving me  
Listen now!  
I was here waiting for you,   
Even though my dreams were far further today.  
I am still here waiting for you,  
Keep on dreaming  
But I am sure that by heart is pulling, on the string that connect us, so  
That girl you meet back then whole had opened her eyes  
Why do, you cry?  
…  
I feel nothing, feel something,  
Where are you, where are you

You can find very the light is  
Where are you, where are you  
Listen now!  
I was here waiting for you,   
Even though my dreams were far further today.  
I am still here waiting for you,  
Keep on dreaming  
But I am sure that by heart is pulling, on the string that connect us, so  
That girl you meet back then whole had opened her eyes  
Why do, you cry?  
As I finished my song, I realized that Elizabeth was crying, Tristan was giving me a proud smile, like the same smile a father gives his child after they had graduated from high school. Even Luke and Sophie were looking at me. I think Sophie even took a sneaky picture during the performance. It felt like my heart could burst any minute now, but I was so proud of myself as well. This was truly a moment I would remember. Elizabeth ran up to me and gave me a hug. A hug I thought only my mother could give me and it made me teary eyed. I felt home in her arms. And before I knew, Tristan was giving both of us a hug, whispering so low that only me and Elizabeth were able to hear it “Good job. I am proud of you.” That was the drop. My eyes got wielded up in tears and hiccups were caught in my throat as I tried to hold back. But they didn’t say anything else than that. They just held me, like I was a child who fell at one point and couldn’t stop crying no matter what people tried. And the hug was the cure. As we stood there, I thought back to my mother and my real father. Would he had hugged me and told me he was proud of me, like Tristan did? If our situation was different and he had stayed, would I then had experienced this kind of love and warmth? I don’t know and I guess it is a thought worth taking up another day?


	8. Some people were just not meant to met

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is longer, as a form of "sorry" for the shorter one before.  
> Hope you will enjoy and thank you.

Oh okay, oh okay. I know, I am a stubborn person and my thoughts is not always the purest, but I am trying my best, okay! And I also have the tendency to be a dumb, dumb. But this was never meant to happen to me, okay. I could not be more ordinary compared to these famous people I am serving, and normally these types of people would had never batted me a glance if it wasn’t because I cleaned their houses and didn’t steal or burned their underwear while I cleaned it. But this happened, how and why, ask God, he is the weird one doing this. So, as you guys remember I started to work at the Trane family household. Apparently, I did an excellent job and even came really close with the very Elizabeth Trane, the very wife of Tristan Trane the famous actor who could play any role thrown into his face. Because of my graduating improving relationship to these weirdoes, had they offered their help to give me more work, so that I could get even more money to pay for singing practices and studio time. And that is how it has come to this… my “other boss”’s name is Edward Smith, he was an upcoming star and he really had an attitude I really hated. He seemed to really not care about me, and I was certain that he could not even remember my name or face. He had a little accident, still not sure what he did, but it had something to do with glass, because when I helped him with his wound and found a piece of glass in it. He gave me a nod as thanks before he left and when I left that day, he didn’t even have the courtesy to say farewell or goodbye or even give me a nod again.   
Now here comes the weird part. All of that happened Tuesday and I had to clean his place again Saturday. I really didn’t want to, but work is work. As I arrived at his house, I entered the code and before I reached the door handle, he had already opened the door. His alabaster skin was still flawless as always and now a legit smile was on it to. Great. “come on in!” he said a bit to smiling for my taste, I thanked him and walked in. He closed the door after me, before following me into the kitchen where he took a spot behind the kitchen isle and leaned onto of the table, resting his head on his hand while staring at me. Creepy. I gave him a confused look as I placed my small bag down on the kitchen isle “I can come and do the cleaning later if you are busy?” I said, and first then did he wake from whatever dream he was dreaming and stood up straight. “Ah no, don’t mind. Act like, I am not even here.” He said before returning to his stances again. Giving him a weird look again I started to clean. And when I started to move to the other rooms, I noticed that he followed me. He was trying and not trying at the same to not to be spotted, but yeah it was pretty obvious that he was keeping an eye on me. What have I done now? I tried to ignore him, and maybe my mind played tricks on me or something. But even when I started to clean the balcony, I noticed that he was not discreet. He tried to hide at the entrance door to the master bedroom while still observing me, while he bites his thumb nail. But when I returned back into the room and tried as fast as he could to run out of there, hoping maybe that I wouldn’t notice. But come on. If he had a problem about anything he should just had said so. As I went back to the kitchen to get some new cleaning water, I noticed him again. The same creepy stalker like stand at the entrance of the kitchen. Scratching my head, I tried to figure out what he wanted, I mean, if he was curious about something or wanted to ask something then why not just do it.   
“Are you okay?” I asked him, and first then did he realize that I knew he was there. “Yeah, everything is great.” He said smiling and even a bit nerve wracking. “If you have any questions or if you want to see how I do my job, just say so, I do not mind.” I then said, I rather have him walking beside me than walking behind like some kind of animal stalking its prey. He started to sound and look even more nervous now, which was weird, but eventually he nodded and walked up to me. “So…” “So…” “Do you like coffee?” He then asked me. Not sure what his problem was, but I guess it was better to be on the safe side, “Yes I do, I guess it had been a while since a had some.” I said with my innocent, professional smile. His smile then grew wider, but only his front teeth were truly showing, “Then let me make some.” He then said and then walked to his coffee machine. He started to brew the coffee as silence again spread. What was I supposed to talk with him about? He is from another world than mine and I had still not seen any of his work yet, so talking about that didn’t really help me. He then turned back to me with a freshly brewed cup of coffee. The smell was great and my mouth started to get watery from just the smell itself. He knew his coffee. I took a sip and the beautiful rounded taste spread thought my mouth and as I swallowed down and through my whole body. A big pleased sighed left my lips and it seemed that he had been watching and properly even waited for my respond. “This is so good. I am really impressed.” I said as I took another sip. “thank you, besides my different jobs and occupations, I take a great deal pride in making excellent cup of coffee. Some say that even my cooking is better than ordinary peoples.” I nodded at his words. I guess, not every entertainer loses their touch to the real world, like cooking a decent meal for example. “Impressive, then I guess you are already better than me at cooking.”  
“Oh, I wouldn’t know that have never tried it.”  
“Well, I want to try yours first. If it as good and perfect as this coffee, then I would love to try it.” If it was even possible for him to smile more, he then amazed me, because he definitely smiled even more and brighter now.   
“I think we can arrange that.” As he said that he left, without another word. He properly had some things to do, I’m not sure. I am just happier that I could get the opportunity to get a really good and maybe even a fancy meal. That will definitely work for me. I continued my cleaning and when I was finally done, he bade me farewell this time, while still smiling. Damn, we didn’t even set a date on when I could get a fancy meal. Oh well, I just ask next time I come for the cleaning. I thought to myself as I left. 

A couple of months passed and every time I went to do my work at Edward’s place I was always greeted with a smile. His clothing turned into more casual clothing, but even then he seemed spotless. We started to talk more about everyday stuff. I told him that I was trying to make it into the entertainment business but the waiting period and scraping money for it took far longer than I had anticipated. If it was a race, then I picked the wrong contestant because even a snail was winning over me. He gave me pointers on how I could improve my singing and even on how to throw my name out there into the world. They were great advices, but I had no whatsoever knowledge on how to do that, and I didn’t have the looks of a model or even close to one. He told me that it was all about the attitude and the way I wanted the public to view me. I had to appear health but still human and relatable. Amazing, and intriguing yet still out of this world. I had to imagine that I would become a role model for younger people and that the more I could inspire them, the bigger chance I had at convincing them. But I had to convince myself first that I was this great and perfect role model before I could even get remotely closer to be the role model for each and every generation. As I said his advices were great, but all the things he had said was easier said than done.   
Besides him giving me advices on how I could improve my talent, we also talked at ourselves as people. I told him that I had a mother, sister and brother and that I was original from the Scandinavian countries. He told me that he was an only child and that he grew with a single father, but they lost all contacts when he decided to pursue the modelling career. He had models since he was 18 years old and when he hit 23, he got his major break through and raised in rank and popularity. A couple of years after that he decided to attend acting classes and learn the art of acting which led to small theater play, but eventually the TV-series. When he got the opportunity to work side by side with Tristan in this upcoming film he was thrilled and excite because Tristan was an actor I really looked up to. As he talked about his passion and adoration of Tristan, he started to remind me of a little kid talking about their favorite superhero. I couldn’t stop myself from chuckling with glee over his joy and admiration of Tristan. As he heard me laughing, he suddenly stopped, like had the look like he had said or done something bad, which wasn’t the point. I quickly apologized and told him that I just adored and liked the way he talked about Tristan. That comment only turned his cheeks red and he turned around looking away as his ears also became more red. How cute. Cute? Oh God, why did I find him cute, he was older than me. I mean, being 28 years old is not that much older than me, but still. As weeks passed by and as we started to learn more about each other I then agree with myself that the dinner plan, was properly just something he had said out of the spur moment, and I just put to much into.   
When I was about to leave one day, Tuesday, he asked me if I was busy Saturday, “No… as far as I know, I was suppose to come clean at you place, but I guess that was, basically it.”, “so no plan what so ever, besides that?” he asked again.  
“No, why?”  
“I just wanted to know… you know, curious.” He gave me now that innocent smile, and I just got that strange feeling that something was up, but after we got to learn more about each other I realized that him being a bit weird, curious and outgoing was pretty much his thing, so I didn’t want to question it any further. I left his place and headed home, he still walked me to the door, waved and bade me farewell. Maybe he asked because he just was curious, who knows.  
As I finally got home, my phone rang and it was the messengers’ ringtone, which meant FAMILY TIME! I pulled my phone up from my pocket and put in my headphones as I accepted the call. The call was from my sister Lea, weird.   
“Hi sis, how are you?” I asked with a high pitch, annoying screaming fan girl voice.   
“Better… I have had better days, but it has finally been finalized.”  
“What has?”  
“the court thingy. You remember? How my ex-boyfriend and used all of our money and then placed both of us in debt.”  
“oh right, yeah, that did happen. So? What did the court say?” my sister let out a relieved sigh.  
“the jury and the judge have agreed to removes my debt and arranged a pay back order. So that I can get all my money back. I even got the house!”  
“That’s awesome! I am so happy for you. Mom just mention that she will help you and that you ex-boyfriend (I really do not remember his name, and who even cares) even used them on random things and women.”  
“Yeah… he was such a scumbag, I should had known.” She started to shake her head in disbelieving at that statement.  
“But now he is out of my life and this time, fuck men! I do not need men and definitely not assholes like him.”  
“Don’t worry sis, you will meet someone, I just know you will.” I tried to give her and comforting smile, but I understood where she came from. I dated a guy for a short while, we shared kisses and promises with each other and when we finally had our first time together, he just blew me of, telling me that he thought I knew that it was only sex and I should stop acting like his girlfriend. Even though we had been together for almost a month. So, I understood that this world really did have some assholes in it, but not all of them were bad I mean. Tristan and I have our differences, but I can see how much he adores Elizabeth and how much he is putting up with me, because I mean so much to her. And Edward. He is a bit quirky sometimes, but deep down, I find him really enjoyable and loveable. Omg, what am I saying? Stop it. I shook my head trying to get the thought of Edward in my head out. Guess my sister had a sixth sense or something because I think she notices.  
“How are you, meeting any new men?” she asked with an uplifted brow and a playful smile on her lips. Grunting a little as I said no and tried to sway her away from that topic.  
“Well, I guess you just do not have the time for it. Could understand on mother that you have been busy.”   
“Yes, I have, but at least it is going forward.”   
“I’m glad to hear that. Anyway… you are not going to believe this!” she suddenly said with a huge smile on her face.  
“I have been watching some series and then I stumbled on this one called… “if it was only me?”.” I could just feel how my face dropped. Oh no.  
“The main character was so hot, you cannot even imagine it.” no I guess not.  
“Anyway, I did some google searching and I discovered that the actors real name was Edward Smith and that not even the best part.” Yaaah… please tell me…  
“He actually lives in Hollywood, the same city you live in.” And there it was. Damn. So, he wants to not only haunt my mind, but also my sister’s mind. Great.   
“Did you even know that?”   
“No, I did not, haven’t even seen that series yet. Has he featured in anything else that I might have seen?”  
Trying to sound as innocent as possible. When my sister fell for someone, she fell hard. She would haunt me, torment me for weeks if she even knew I had met him. Do not even want to know, what she would do to me if she found out that I had not only cleaned his house, but had a casual conversation with him and had known him for a couple of months now. She would have placed my head on a spike and screamed like a warlord “This is a traitor! This is a traitor!” erk… that does not sound pleasant.   
“No, I guess you wouldn’t have seen him, because he hasn’t done any films or series yet that matches your type of genre. But as far as I could read, he is making a film with Tristan Trane! Both of them are so handsome, I would kill just to see them or even shake their hands.” Okay. Mental note. Never EVER, tell Lea that you have talked with either of them. And never tell that you have even been hugged by Tristan Trane. God I am so going to hell.   
You hear that, Satan. I have already booked a spot right next to you, so don’t you dare give it away to someone else, I have already called the dips on that chair.  
I just laughed at her excitement for these news she was telling me and tried to see if I could steer this conversation elsewhere.  
“How is Louis by the way? Can we finally tell the world that we are going to become aunts?”  
“Oh yes, Kathrine she getting closer to end her second trimester.”  
“Great! Do they whether it’s going to be a boy or a girl.” I was so happy about this news, cannot even believe that I am soon becoming an aunt.  
“They have announced that the doctor had confirmed that it was a boy.” My sister started to jump with glee on the spot, smiling and grinning at the news.  
“Oh, a boy. I cannot believe it. everything is happening so fast.”  
Well I hope that you will come back sometime and greet him, when he gets born, of course.”  
“Yeah! I want nothing else. I want him to meet his greatest aunt in the world.”  
“Well I know I am amazing, but we were talking about you, silly.” She always knew how to annoy me, by magically turning my words into her favor.  
“Ha ha. But yeah, I will be there. I will write to all of you in an advance when I come back for a visit.”  
“Great! I’m so happy to hear that.”  
We continued out little talk, talking about everything and nothing as usual. She kept talking about “if it was only me” series and I started to dream away. I was wondering whether someone like Edward could ever like someone like me. Compared to all the women he had been socializing with and properly also the woman in the future, would someone like me even fit in. I mean, yeah we talk great together now, and it had even become nice talking with him. I feel more relaxed talking to him now, than I did at the start, and I think he his feeling the same. But I guess that the mere thought of use being together will be the biggest joke. When it is just him and me, I do not even think that he is an upcoming star and have fans like my sister, but when I talk to others like my sister and he gets mentioned I realize that we live two different world. I try to enter his world, but as I said the pace is so slow, and even though I have received great advice from Edward and Tristan I still feel that I have a long road ahead of me. I knew that this road could be long and dreadful, but some part of me could still not believe that this was actually happening. I guess what I am trying to say is, some people were just not meant to meet and if they met then they were just not meant to be.


	9. Let's get this back-up

I arrived at the Trane’s household on a Monday, the weather was starting to become colder and the wind gave me a small chilled when I walked. But this weather could not even be compared to the weather I was used to in my homeland, so I just had to get used to it. I walked in as usual. After a while we have become more casual with each other and I do not know when “being casual with each” and “part of the family” were our new thing. But I guess since I have now almost worked here for a year without any problems, then the relationship we have must be stable and great. I did my usual cleaning as always and finished my day with coffee and tea together with Elizabeth.   
“Uh… These cookies are delicious. What are they?” I asked Elizabeth as I shoved my mouth with more cookies. Before she could even answer me, I had already filled my mouth up to the brim which resulted in me not being able to close my mouth and cheeks dilated to the fullest.   
She made a cute little giggle as she looked and me and then later look away to laugh a bit louder, “you look like a giant chipmunk.” If my mouth wasn’t as filled up, I would had tightened my lips and maybe even had given a badass come back, but I just remained with glaring eyes. As I tried to chew through all the cookies, she continued, “These are oatmeal cookies, with hazelnuts and raisins. They are healthy, so even if you had stuff your mouth with them, I guess it not that bad. All the sugar I had to use in the recipe, I changed with a healthier solution. But it is never healthy eating more than your stomach can handle.” She kept on talking on how healthy she was, and properly only wanted that for me as well. But compared to her, I suck at cooking, and I work and practice singing in my spare time, I could not really see when I had the time to make oatmeal cookies with all kinds of crap. Elizabeth just kept on rambling, I kept on eating the cookies, and I guess that we at some point annoyed Tristan somehow. Tristan came storming into the kitchen where we sat and looked furious. My mouth was filled up again with cookies, so I couldn’t come up with any comment and Elizabeth stopped talking and look surprise at Tristan cause of his bursting in. And then he practically yelled, “Elizabeth! Be quiet, she is clearly to dumb to even understand what you are saying anyway, you should be surprised if she even understood 10 % of the words you blurred out. And you!” he said pointing at me, as I took another cookie into my mouth, “Don’t you have anything better to do, than sit here and eat me out of my own house.” As I lifted my next cookie, I could see the vein in his forehead was finally about to pop as his face became more red with fury, “no, not really… because seeing you in tomato color, eating you out of your house and getting the bonus of annoying you at the same time really do something to me.” I said smirking. If this was a cartoon, then Tristan head would had exploded by his rage. What was he even mad about? Maybe I had accidentally peed on his breakfast and forced him to start the day with the wrong foot. You can’t blame the messenger.   
Before I knew it, I was standing outside the house as the door was smacked right behind me. I turned toward the door, because how I got there, I still was not quite sure. I was about to knock on the door when Elizabeth’s head popped out, but also only her head. “Sorry sweety, Tristan has had some rough days and he only told me that it was work stuff. I am sorry it had to affect you too.” I made a snort sound as I made a gesture to her that she shouldn’t mind that, “Don’t worry, it’s okay. When he his finally happy or angrier than, I will make sure to have a better comeback.” I said smiling. She didn’t look that pleased about my statement, but she stilled gave me an apologetic look while apologizing before closing the door. Well, at least I got to eat a lot of cookies for free. As I walked home, I started to wonder about Tristan’s behavior more. I had never seen him losing his temper like that, he had always been cruel, cold and conculcated. This was just plain rage. Elizabeth mentioned something about it was his job. And the only one I know beside Tristan and Elizabeth how would have any knowledge about that was Edward. Maybe I just ask him when I have to work at his place again. It could be nice to solve this problem. For Elizabeth sake. Yeah, let just say for her sake.

I had work at Edward’s place, and I was ready to leave my apartment when my phone rang. It was George.   
“Hi George, it’s rare for you to call me this early in the morning.”  
“Are you doing anything right now?”  
“Actually…” I was about to give him an answer when George cut me off right in the middle of my explanation.   
“Good! I have found some wonderful back-up singers. They had only time to practice and do the interview here in an hour, so I need you a zap!” I got totally flustered. Omg! This is happening, and since he didn’t mention ant money then it must mean that they are doing it for free. I have to attend to this. But then… what about Edward and the mystery behind Tristan’s massive, (really funny), rage? But then again, this comes first, everything else was just my steppingstones to do this, I have to prioritize.   
“I am coming right away, where are we meeting them?” I said with a serious look on my face, as I turned around and redressed into something a bit more appropriate for this situation.   
“Lucas is coming to get you and he should be there any minute now. We are meeting them at the studio, we will try to see how their voices will match with yours, but more on the matter when you are here.”  
We hanged up and right as I was finish with redressing, putting on make-up and then grabbing my small bag with everything I headed for the door. When I reached it, I heard a banging on my door and stood Lucas. Perfect timing as always. He always knew when to come exactly. As we both headed for the car and while we walked, I started to look for Edward’s contact information on my phone, I just had to inform him, that I couldn’t come today. He would understand right. He has been so supportive of this route I had been taking, but I am still not as close to him as I am with Elizabeth, he is still sometimes a big puzzle for me. I called him up with my phone, and hoped he wouldn’t take it, because then I could just leave a message saying that I wouldn’t come today. But this is me we are talking about, not everything is always going the way we wanted it to.  
“Hello Astrid, what’s wrong?”  
“Hi Edward, um… something came up and I don’t think I can make it today, I’m sorry.”  
It was quiet at the other end of the line, then it broke because he finally started to talk after 2 minutes of silences.  
“It’s okay. Don’t worry. I get it. I get that I was too pushy, but I had never realized that I was so uncomfortable to be around that you had to get away from me. But yeah, whatever.” I was so stunned by his words and how he just hanged up on me afterwards. I was about to call him back, angry, concerned and confused, when Lucas said we had arrived. I have to deal with this later, I didn’t have the time dealing with an accusation when something more important was at hand. My career, my singing, the things I have been working for, for almost a year now. Yeah. Focus. … WHAT DID HE MEAN BY THAT! You know what? I will finish this shit up with the outmost elegance. Then I am going to rush to his place and beat the shit out of him, to ever think that about me. I will grind his face against his floor until wrinkles become permanent on his face until he apologies to me for ever think and say that to me. He is so going to regret making me angry, that piece of pop!   
As I entered the studio, I met with George who, as no surprise, haven’t done anything. How he had convinced back-up singers to be part of this, I will always wonder. But hey, sometimes it is best not to know how the magician does his tricks, the whole illusion about that person is sometimes the only thing that keep that person above water. George had a shirt on again, but at least this it was black. I guess that an old dog really can learn new tricks. If only he had that on when I meet the first time. But the jeans were the same and look like the could fall down any moment. His glasses were not completely smudged with something brown and stick only the upper part of them. Guess that was the only place he did not complete minded or just hurried to clean his glasses and only did the part he could reach with ease. His hair was smoothed back but not that well. Some of the hair strands were starting to leave their position and they went for his eyes, and he still needed a shave. His beard was so uneven that it surprises me that he hasn’t noticed it himself. Or maybe he had, he just thought it wasn’t necessary to do anything about it.   
George waved me to come over to him and when I did the smelled hit me. A combination of something rotten, soap and something third? Baby powder? I never thought one’s nose could be violated like this. If my nose could sue people, then it had sued his ass a long time ago. We walked together towards the recording studio. As we entered the room, the back-up singers were already practicing MY song!   
The were at the part singing with one at high pitch, another with a lower rumbling and the last was keeping her voice in a constant line, not going above nor below.

I feel nothing, feel something,  
Where are you, where are you

You can find very the light is  
Where are you, where are you

Goosebumps started to creep up my arms as I heard them. This was amazing, they would match perfectly to my own singing and they even seem to enjoy my song. As they finish up the song, they looked at each together with glee before leaving the recording area. When all three of them were out of the area, they noticed me and smile like a unity.   
The tall brunette started to talk first, “You must be Astrid. We have just finished up your song and I must say that we agree on that this is a hit.” The other girls nodded at the tall brunette’s statement and it warmed my heart. The anger I felt before, because of Edward, was starting to pass and I couldn’t stop myself from smiling like a little idiot, “Thank you! You guys sounded amazing and hit the nail right on its head with the emotions you laid into it.” We started to exchange names and talk about my vision and style for my music and that the studio/George was the ones giving me the melody and then I wrote myself the song. The tall, brunette’s name was Ida, she was close to hit her 30’th birthday and had train her voice since she was a child. But she had never been interested in making her own music, but she was able to do a lot with her given voice and that was why she could be a back-up singer and do it for a living. The smallest of them was named Tina. She had black hair and reminded me of an apple. A black apple. Her voice, when talking, was already deeper than normal women’s voices and that helped her when she had to hit the tone for the bass. The third was just as standard as me. She was not thin nor thick, so yeah almost similar to me, and she looked plain. She was also very quiet, so she would definitely be someone who will disappear in a crowd and before anyone would had notice she was gone or had even arrived. Even her voice was standard. Even her name was standard, Mia. It’s amazing. I thought I was regular and plain, but now I had met the true definition of that type of person. I guess I should be blessed. We all talked a bit more about their own vision and dreams and whether they could see themselves helping me to achieve my dreams.  
We talked for what felt like hours before George jumped into the conversation, “Okay. I am happy to see that you girls are getting along, but I am not getting any younger. So, have you girls come to an agreement on my offer?” Ida, Mia and Tina exchanged looks between on another before saying at the same time, “We accept.” What they had accepted to, I was not quite sure about, but I soon founded out, “excellent! Then we will record the song again, and this time you girls are in it to. Are you girls ready for next Tuesday?”   
“We sure are!” they said at the same. Damn, they were completely synchronized. Bets that helpful. As we rapped up our meeting, or whatever this was, we said our farewells with a hug and parted way. I almost ran to Lucas’ car and gave him a huge shock when I banged with full force on his driver seat’s door. “Take me to this address!” without a second thought on his part, he nodded in fright over that he had never seen me this flustered before. As I took my spot at the passenger seat, we drove away, while we both watched George stumble out of the studio building’s door with an uplifted hand screaming something, we both couldn’t decipher.  
As we reached Edward’s house, I ran out of the car again, gave Lucas my thanks and hurried for the gate. I pressed in the code and went for the front door. I smashed it open and started to look around for Edward. Discovering him sitting on his couch, watching the news and look up on me with a startled face. Apparently, I had startled him so much that he had spill his sandwich all over himself and had mustard, lettuces, tomatoes, and chicken, I think, all over his shirt and pants.   
“What the...?” He started but I interrupted him, with my own even louder yelling, “What the hell did you mean by what you said over the phone!?”   
“I didn’t mean to hurt feelings, if you even have that, but you pretty much ruined my sandwich now!”  
“If I even have that!” my voice came out of my mouth almost shrieking with anger, “I will let you know, that I have enjoyed your company and you were even starting to convince me that you are a decent person, but if you think so little of me, then fine!” I was about to go out of the front door when he started to call after me. Still annoyed, I stopped in my tracks and turned around back to him with a furious look on my face.  
“Look. I’m sorry. I guess I am used to people leaving me, without any explanation when they had felt they have gotten what they wanted from me. I just thought that you had planned on doing the same, so I pretty much said it to make it less painful for myself.” Standing still with frowned eyebrows but started to calm down a bit more, I noticed the hurt on his face and in his eyes. Maybe he had tried that so many times and didn’t know what was real and what was fake anymore when it came to friendship. He maybe just did what he did best, leave before it became worse. I let out an annoyed sigh and covered my face in my hands trying to calm myself down from my anger. I didn’t say anything else just sat there with sandwich pieces all around him. After a bit of silence, I decided to finally break it, “If I didn’t like you or hated being near you, you would not even doubt it. I suck at faking and I am primarily only together with people I like or care about. Does that help easing your mind?” my words seemed to have done something for him because he didn’t look sad anymore, more… hopeful? I guess that is the right word for it. He stood up, making all the sandwich pieces fall onto the floor. Great. He does know that I would have to be the one cleaning that up, right? He walked closer to me and stopped right in front of me with a hopeful gleam in his eyes and a relieved smile on his lips, “thank you. Then why couldn’t you come today?” Swallowing loudly, I tried to keep my posture in front of him. Why does he has to be this gorgeous? Even with mustard all over his clothing he still looks perfect. It is so unfair. “My producer called and told me that I had to come to be at the studio, a zap. I had to go to it, but after our talk on the phone, I had a bit of trouble concentrating on my work there.” He didn’t seem hurt over that I had a hard time concentrating on my job, he looked even more happy for some reason. “I’m sorry” he just said while still smiling. I don’t think he was sincere about that apology and I even said that before I realized I had said it, “Then let me make a dinner as a form of apology to you. You don’t have anything else to do today, right?”  
“No? Not as far as I know.”,   
“Great! Then that’s settles then. I go get changed. I know mustard looks great on me, but…”, I started to chuckle and so did he, before leaving to go upstairs. I took a deep breath and got rid of the rest of my anger and resentment and started to clean up after his sandwich disaster. Because I just knew that I had to do it anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will come shortly and if it was the romance you had been waiting for then some come now, but yeah...  
> "Patience is the key, my dear."


	10. At least try

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short chapter. I sure hope that is not a problem, it just the end gave me an ending vibe for now on that chapter. But don't worry. It is not done yet, at all.  
> Thank for reading it, by the way.

Edward started to cook dinner and I could not really decode what it was he was making for us. Pots and pans flew everywhere, and a big mess was starting to pill up over at the sink, but I guess that the result is what matters the most. I started to find silverware and plates for both of us as he continued his magic. And after some minutes that felt like a lifetime, he finally turned around with a bowl of salat and something else in it and a chicken dish with fried vegetable next to it on the pan. His smile was so bright, and he placed the dishes down on the coasters, “Here you go, please take a seat.” He gestured to one of the chairs on the opposite side from him and I took the seat. “It looks really good and if I remember correctly you did say something about that people praised you for your cooking.” He took a seat himself and started to fill up my plate as he answered “Well, people could also just had said it out of sheer politeness. I mean, it wouldn’t surprise me.” He sounded so doubtful about himself when it came to anything else than the entertainment business. I wonder what a person must have gone through to become so cynical about oneself. “Well, I promise that I will tell you if it sucks.” I told him with an innocent and gleaming smile. He made a low chuckle and started to fill up his own plate. We ate in quite until I couldn’t stop my curiosity any longer. “Did anything happened on the film set, you and Tristan are on?” he gave me a surprised look then a confused one, “no… why do you ask?”  
“Well, yesterday when I was at the Trane’s house to do my job, I had coffee and cookies with Elizabeth. As she was talking about something with health, Tristan came in furious and snapped at Elizabeth and trash talked me, not that it was anything new, but he normally does that more elegantly.” I said more curious now. “He is normally not home, and it didn’t seem to be neither me nor Elizabeth he was angry at, but something else. And I do not like when I am not the source of his distress.” He started to chuckle again, then cleared his throat before answering me with a serious look, “Okay, I will tell. But promise me that you will not tell this to anyone else, not even Elizabeth.”   
As you guys know… I share everything with you so let’s just make it clear that when they have told me not to share or tell anything to anyone, I, of course, already done that with you. But that because you guys can read my thoughts and follow my story and distress, that I think that I am legally excused. I really hope that the jury and the judge will think that to. “Of course, you can tell me. I will not tell a soul (yeah right).” He shrugged in his chair and seemed to prepare himself on how to tell this without letting out too many details on something, “Okay, me and him were shooting some scenes together and he got a bit annoyed with me because I didn’t have my head in the game. I apologized to him and tried to do better, but it just didn’t seem to work. He asked me with the problem was and I told him that…” he stopped telling the story and starred right at me, properly looking for words. I decided not to say anything, “that um… there was something I wanted to do, but I didn’t know how or if it was even in my place to do it.” I started to nod, was not quite sure were this was going, but “And what did Tristan say?” I asked him since he stopped completely. “He told me that I should go for it and asked what the worst could happen. But also sounded like I shouldn’t do it because of… personal reasons from his part.” He finished.   
I think I know what this was about.  
How could I be so blind!  
It is so obvious!  
HE  
IS  
Trying to look for a new job and Tristan had already applied for it, but then Tristan got rejected and that is why he was angry and that was why it was personal to him. Its all falling into place.   
I nodded and then started to clean up the table before I addressed to him, “Edward, it is okay to follow your heart and if you truly want this then do what Tristan said and go for it.” his eyes became big and almost shining. I truly think I guess correctly. “My advice is, what my mother often told me when I wanted to pursue something.” Now Edward stood and started helping me cleaning of the table while he kept watching me intensely. “She said, Astrid. You will never know anything, until you try. There will always be two ways things could go. Good and bad. And if you never try, then nothing will ever happen. You may become scared at first and whole fear of rejection could hold you back but being rejected is not always bad. It just means that then you can move on. And if it goes well, then Astrid, it can only become greater from that point onwards.” I stopped in my tracks and look at him with a comforting smile and even he had stopped in front of me looking down with those hopeful eyes again. I felt that time stopped at that moment, “So, you want me to pursue this?”, I nodded at him and said “yes.” And before I knew it his lips was on mine. My eyes became big and I looked at him while he kissed me dumbfounded. His lips were so soft, not even a crack was on them. They felt like fluffy clouds and for a moment I thought to myself that I didn’t mind just standing here in the fluffy clouds. His smell of lavender and lemon. The warmth from his lips to my body felt electrifying. As fast as it happened, as fast it disappeared as he pulled himself away. I was struck. I didn’t know what to say or think or do… someone help me! He then looked deep into my eyes and whispered to me in a soft almost purring voice, “I like you.”. Those words must have had magical powers because my knees turned into jelly and I suddenly found it difficult to stand up. He then wrapped his arms around me, pressing me into the crock of his neck and seemed like he was guarding me from all bad. Like I could break at any moment and he wouldn’t let me, because I could remain and be safe in his arms.  
He likes me? No one had ever said that so passionately to me before. Was it even okay for me to like him back? He had been on my mind, but I had never in my dreams thought that he would like me, so I pushed those thoughts away? And besides… I am his maid for God sake! It may not be what I wanted and one day I would not be a simple house maid anymore, but for now I am. And if people found out he and I were together then the shitstorm will first then really hit and I would become famous, not because of my talent, but because of rumors and… him. I wanted to say something, yet I feared what I would say because my heart screamed “yes!” and if it was up to my heart I would properly already had sex with him right now, no scratch that, I would have done it ages ago. But my head says it is dumb and keep asking whether I could handle the pressure and be a target for not only his fans but also family members. My head hurts and my heart hurts to. What I am supposed to say?


	11. Was this it?

I cleaned the kitchen table at Elizabeth and Tristan’s place. After Edward had holden me so close to his chest and our hugging lasted an eternity, which I didn’t mind. My mind raced away like a wild, free horse. He let go of me and told me that he wanted my answer the next time I came to his place, which was on Saturday. In my mind I didn’t even know if I had an answer prepare at that time. My heart and brain do not normally disagree, but this time they did. Big time. I wanted so bad to tell him that I liked him to. He was already more to me than a friend and I sometimes even caught him being on my mind before I realized it, but. I started to imagine how it would be, but each scenario because weirder and weirder. The first one was sweet and simple enough. Me coming up at his door telling him that he is the one for me, throwing myself into his arms as we twirl around like a stupid couple. The next was him and me getting together, getting married, having kids, living on a prairie with no one around. But that just sounded boring and really not me. I mean, we both wanted to be in the entertainment business. He was already there, but I was still clawing my way into it, so the second scenario could never happen. Then I thought of our maid + boss relationship. Now that just kinky. That is a fantasy I properly shouldn’t open the door to. But… if I just had to take a sneak peek it would properly be something like this.  
Me in a true maid outfit, having the black and white colors. A true French maid outfit with a dusting brush and everything. Then coming up to the master. Looking down at me like I am some filthy animal yet caress my right cheek and left breast as a smirk comes up on his lips. Maybe even smoking a cigar and blow that thick smoke into my face, as I suck it all in. Looking at him like he was some kind of God, who I wasn’t even worthy of his gaze. And him having that glint in his eyes before tearing my cloth apart with such ferocity with his hands and teeth. Nails scrapping against my skin until blood starts to pimple from the wounds. Then his teeth on my neck biting me so hard, just so I knew I belonged to him. As his hands was busy pulling of the rest of the cloth before finding my nipples and…  
I didn’t notice Elizabeth coming up from behind me before I heard her talking to me, “Are you okay? You have been cleaning the same spot for an hour now and your face is red. Like, REALLY red! Are you sick?”  
Elizabeth’s face came into my field of view and a small jump came from me in plain surprise. Thank God she wasn’t a mind reader because that was close. I told myself that it was only a sneak peek, but I guess I got carried away. Laughing nervously to myself, I shifted position and moved to the sink to rewash the cloth. “No nothing! Do not worry.” I said all high-pitched and shrilled. She only looked at me suspiciously, “You know, I am wiser than I may sometime appear. And I also have a husband who talks with Edward.”   
As she said his name, I couldn’t stop myself from turning towards her even more panicked and red, if that was even possible. She just gave me that victorious smile, like she just had won the war, and looked at me like I had to soon admit utterly defeat. She then sat down elegantly on one of the kitchen chairs, brushing of her dress before crossing her legs with the same victorious look. She really enjoyed this. I breathed out a heavy sigh and then sat down on one of the chairs myself. “So…” I started, but I was not really sure how I should continue. Luckily, she did, “You and Edward! I have only met him twice because of conference meetings with the stars of the film and the films sponsors. He is so polite and gentle. But I would never imagine this!” I felt that my heart had sunk lower down in my chest. I guess I was not the only one who had the same thought, that him and me being together would be unthinkable because of our positions. Elizabeth must had seen my depressed face because she quickly continued, “I mean. You are so cute I could almost eat you up, and I sometimes consider you to be like my own daughter. You are like the daughter I had always wished for. Just the thought that someone else has noticed how cute you are, makes me angry.” She then said giving me a pouting face. I started to laugh, and it seems my heart had stopped it sinking down, it was so relieving to laugh again. “Thank you. You are my best friend and my mother, and hearing you supporting me, really helps.” Small tears were pressing at the edge of my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. She then took her hand in mine and gave me that motherly smile and look, telling that everything will be okay, “I know that you must be confused right now, but you cannot in the end decided who you will fall in love with. I you love him, then tell him. He can seem strong, bold and rational, but trust me. Men in that kind of business also need confirmation and acknowledgement and most importantly… no one is a mind reader. You have to tell them what is in your heart or else they will never know.” She then gave my hand a little squeeze before letting it go. We starred at each other a few seconds longer, allowing myself to come to that conclusion that if my heart wanted this, then brain. Buckle up and do your best to support it and help. I was about to thank her again when she continued, “Well, enough mopping around. You may have cleaned the table for a whole hour, but you are still missing the rest of the house. Chop, chop!” she then said standing up on her feet while rushing me with her clapping to hurry me along. I thought she was joking at first until she gave me a rare glaring look, which told me that I better hurry up or else…

As Saturday came closer and closer, I got more excited and scared at the same time. I will tell Edward that I feel the same, that I like him, and we could easily figure something out, so that both of us become satisfied. But what if he had changed his mind or something else had happened which meant I misunderstood or, or… Brain shut up! You are not helping me right now. Okay, take a deep breath and think happy thoughts. That was when my phone started to ring, and I fell on the floor as I was grabbing out for my phone. After a short grunting over that my face just head to act like a magnet to the wooden floor and now my forehead hurts like hell. I accepted the call without even seeing who it was, “Hello?”  
“Hey Astrid.” It was Edward and a shriek got passed my lips. “Are you okay?” I cleared my throat before answering, “Yeah of course! Never been better. So, what up?” I said hoping that I didn’t sound to forced and shrieky. “Actually I just wanted to tell you that you do not need to come this Saturday, because…” he didn’t manage to say more before a loud sound came in the background and a woman’s voice could be heard saying “Oh you are so handsome! We will be the best couple on Saturday, I just know it! Here give me a small kiss.” My eye started to twitch, and my nose started to rile up and my lips pushed together in a straight line. Oh, I’m piss. So, he is blowing me of to go out with another woman on the same night he wanted to hear my confession. Even after HE had told ME that HE liked ME! Oh, hell no! I heard something weird, but I wasn’t surprised if it was a smooch from his part! “Anyway…” was he starting to say before a blew him of, “That’s okay! I didn’t even want to come this Saturday, so yeah, I am so happy that you did it for me! Goodbye!” and then I hanged up. That big assed prick thinks that he can toss around my feelings like they grew on trees. Oh no my friend! Now you are barking up at the wrong tree! I kind of hoped he would call, just to hear why I was so angry, but it never came. There was only one person in this whole world that knew my hate right now and knew how to handle it. And that was one of my old friends. The legendary Julia! She had done things in her life, normally you as just a human being shouldn’t have done. But if I knew anyone who knew how to handle this distress, sorrow, and anger on the max level, then she was my girl! She was my childhood friend and she had tried everything. Narcotics, starting fires, being in physical fights, pumping for alcohol poising, and the list just go on. I haven’t really talked to any of my “friends” since I left for Hollywood, and that was my fault.   
I found her name on messengers’ phone call list and tried my luck. Ring, ring… ring, ring… ring, bib, I removed the phone from my ear thought I had fail going through when I discovered that it had actually gone through. “Hello?” I then said, a bit scared since I didn’t hear another one the other end of the line.  
“Oh girl! You better have a good explanation on why you haven’t called me since you moved to that God forsaken, burning of a place!” Okay she was mad, but I could fix this, I hope, “I’m sorry, I should had called you a long time ago, but I was packed up every day and I have now finally some free time for my girl.” I said trying to sound jolly even though I was burning with rage on the inside.   
“What happened?” she then just said annoyed.  
“Why must something has happened to me to call my favorite person.” She didn’t sound convinced. “Because every time you call me, in the middle of something important or out of the blue in the middle of the night for you, then something had happened. Do I look stupid to you?” She took me by surprise, I guess I wasn’t as mysterious as I hoped I was.   
I sighed heavy before answering, “I am angry because there was this guy I liked and he said that he liked me to, but I think he is together with another women and are not even trying to hide it either. I am so angry, and I don’t know what to do.”  
“Hmm…” she then started, “burn his place!”  
“WHAT! NO!” I then yelled.  
“Hmm… does he has any animal.”  
“No, and I do not like where this is going.” I sneered.  
“Okay, okay. Calm down, my plan was not to harm the animal, so hold your horns.” I scorned,  
“I don’t want to do or say anything that could harm him psychically or myself in anyway.” I then said after calming down a bit.   
“Hmm…” I know. Catch him in the middle of the act.”  
“What?”  
“You said he liked you right, which means you only need to prove to him that he doesn’t by catch him in the act. It will give you closure and on the plus side you have then every right to tear this stupid face into pieces.” I thought about her plan, it wasn’t that hard. I had the code and key to his place so walking in and waiting was easy enough and then bam! Hit him with a coffee mug so that I could escape. It sounded so simple.   
“You know. That actually does not sound bad.” I then agreed with Julia.   
“Awesome, send me some pics when then deed is done.” And then she hanged up. I hanged then up myself and started my planning. I am not a cruel person, but. People have treated me like a fool for a long time, and he had convinced my heart that I was in love with him. Maybe I really was a person who belonged in a straight jacket with a gag ball in her mouth in an asylum. 

Saturday came in a blink of an eye and the fright and glee I had felt before when I waited for this day, did no longer exist. I had found my black leggings, which made it easier to move around in. My black tight blouse and then I bought a black balaclava, which looked weird when I bought it, because I already wore my outfit at that time. That was maybe not the best idea I had had but now they were more aware. My snickers were white, but they were the only ones I had that didn’t make any creaking sounds. Maybe I should had used my money on something more useful instead, but whatever. I observed his house, making sure that there were no life before venturing in. as I approached the gate and was about to press the code in, I remembered the second time I came here, where he knew right away that I was here. Maybe the gate had some kind of code or mechanism which told the owner when someone had arrived, pressing the code correctly in or not. I didn’t want to take the chance, so I squeezed barely in between to bars, which I knew the neighbor had broke a week ago, and if I knew him then he hasn’t fixed it yet, but he will soon regret that he didn’t.   
Successful! stage 1 complete - the gate.  
Venturing on. I went for the front door and tried to use my key. But it didn’t work. Okay so he had time to change the locks, but not fixing his fence. Come on. I studied the key I had bought with me and then realized that I had brought the wrong key with me. Damn it, Astrid! You had one job! But I had come so far. Okay, I am not even inside, but it was awful squeezing through those bars. I looked around trying to come up with some idea to how I could continue my adventure like a spy. I just wasn’t as elegant as a spy, but I had the outfit. I was actually pretty proud of it. Come one, Astrid! Think! There must be something, I don’t want him to come home before I even have gotten in. That will just be a huge failure on my part and then revenge wouldn’t be mine.   
Wait… he couldn’t be one of those people that hide a spare key somewhere as a from of emergency. Would he? He does seem like the type and he properly wouldn’t think that a person could get pass his fence and gate. He just forgot that the amazing person was me, but I wasn’t trying to rob him, so he got at least that lucky. I searched each and every places, the door frame the window frames on the side of the house and even look for pots or small things and just as I was about to give up a loose board started to creak. He couldn’t have. I dotted to the board and I was able to lift it up and there it was. A spare key for emergency. Damn I would have been a great thief. I picked the key up and unlocked the door and entered his house. It was dark and so quiet. Fear and a bit of excitement started to spread in my body, and I felt that all my sense sharpened. I scanned the place, trying to determine where the best hiding spot would be. He shouldn’t be back for a while, right. Maybe I should had been surer about how long he was supposed to be away. But I guess that means that I had no time to waste. I tried at first to see if I could hide below the couch, the level was to low for a squeezy girl like me to hid there. Maybe just behind the couch? No, no… if he and his lady friend went straight to the bedroom then I would be discovered right of way. The kitchen area was also to risky, what if they wanted food or drinks from the bar and then noticed a cray, cray girl like me hiding behind the kitchen counter. I tried different spots, and I needed to see them first before I could follow them to wherever they traveled to after that. Sneaking around trying to find the perfect spot, I came closer to a sudden stop. I heard some noises outside and then heard something starts to scrabble against the door. Out of plain fear I jumped down on the floor and started to crawl towards the small room where all the cleaning items and supplies were and then avoided to close the door completely so I still could see what was happening. It is amazing how fast you can think when adrenaline is pumping throughout your system. Edward and a beautiful browned haired woman scrabbled through the door. Edward looked annoyed and she looked even angrier. She walked in and went straight to the bar. Thank God a scratched that idea. As she pulls out one of his bottles of whiskey, she started her rambling, “Okay Ed! I do not know what is wrong with you, but you have been nothing more than a pain in my bum.” He just nodded to her words, grabbing a glass of whiskey himself before walking towards the couch without a word. But I guess he didn’t have to because she continued nicely on her own, “I’m I have been here by your side all night trying my best to not only give you a great night, but even tried to mix you op with some of my girls!” She continued before taking a big gulp of the whiskey, almost completed her glass, “I mean you had never had any problems before screwing with my friends, so why suddenly the change of heart.” He just shrugged his shoulders and didn’t respond, he just starred out into nothing. He then took a sip, without any change in his expression. She then walked closer to him and I started to see her better. By the way thank God they picked the couch because this closet had a great view to the couch. However, this woman looked familiar… I remember knowing, she was that supermodel that had won three awards and only participated in fashion show’s for either Prada or Gucci and was always the main attraction in those kinds of event. Even a weirdo like me knew who she was. Omg, I knew who she was, but not even Edward. Ups. But I cannot remember her name. Have never been that good at names, but faces, that was my specialty.   
She was now sitting next to Edward whispering something in his ear, but I couldn’t decipher what it was. Pressing my whole face into the little peek hole I had just to get a bit closer. Maybe that helped. … It didn’t.  
He didn’t seem to react to whatever she had whispered to him, he seemed even more distant now. Then she finally talked a bit louder, “You know, Edward. People had been wondering why you haven’t made a move on me yet.” He didn’t say anything, just sat there, “I am normally not a person who begs, but you are so handsome and perfect that it would almost be a shame not getting a taste myself.” I had to bite into my own finger to keep myself from screaming, “stop!” because I couldn’t. I would had blown my cover and that would be even worse. She then sat on top of him, so they sat there, face to face, starring at each together. He didn’t do anything, just looked at her. Then she slowly leaned forward, and I just knew that they were kissing. I feel numb. No matter how angry and awful I had been entering into his house without permission, I was still not heartless. Every fiber in my body hurt as tears started to fill up into my eyes. I leaned back into the closet and tried to hold my breath, to prevent myself from crying out loud. But hiccups came, and I used all my energy trying to calm myself down. It hurts. Why does it hurt so much? Even though he is right out there, kissing another woman who would be a much more compatible than myself, I still felt that he was moons away. I didn’t want to look at them, I didn’t want to do anything. I felt so numb. What did I expect? This was what I expected, right? Crying softly into my knees, so low that I couldn’t even hear myself, I waited and planned that I just would stay there until he went to sleep and then sneak out, like nothing had happened. As my tears hit my knees and all my dreams and images of him and me together went with them, I just sat there. Hoped and prayed for a miracle, but I was at that point certain, that it would never come to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry.


	12. I love you

“Astrid.” I look up from my position and started to get closer to the small crack in the door. Did I hear correctly? “Astrid.” There it was again, and I guess I wasn’t the only one who heard it. Edward called out my name! Smashing my face against the closet door just to get closer. I saw that the woman lifted raptly her own head from him. “What did you say?” she then asked him with a confused and hurt look on her face. I still couldn’t believe my ears. Did he really say my name? He then looked startled himself mix also with confusion, “I…” he then let out a sigh and lifted her away from his lap and down onto the couch again. He gulped the last of the whiskey in his glass down, “I can’t do this Mona.” Mona! Of course, that was her name, now I wouldn’t hit myself on the head over forgetting that name. “What do you mean? It’s just sex.” She then said, trying to jump back onto his lap, but he prevented her from doing that by standing up and then walk back to the kitchen. I couldn’t clearly see the kitchen, so I was not sure what he was doing. “I won’t do it with you.” I then heard him say from over the kitchen. “Won’t do it! Do you find me that ugly or repulsive! You are the only guy I haven’t been with, and I am one of the few girls you haven’t been with. What the hell is stopping you now!” She was practically screaming at him now and had stood up herself from the couch. She then stormed towards the kitchen, which didn’t help me because I couldn’t clearly see what they were doing, but I had an idea. It was mostly muffled for me, and I again was not sure what they said. But then I heard a loud slap, high heels walking fast over the floor and then a loud bang, like a door had been slammed with full force. I didn’t realize that I had hold onto my breath before I was heaving for air. Edward then came into my field of vision again, drinking more whiskey from his glass, left cheek all red. He swallowed the liquid, then threw the glass onto the floor without a care in the world. My tears had still not stopped running down my cheek, they just refused to stop pouring out of my eyes. Edward then started to walk towards me, but he was properly heading for his bedroom. I scouted back into the back of the closet, hoping that he wouldn’t notice me. I held my breath again as he walked by and when he had passed me, I let it go. I had never tried to sleep in a closet before, but I guess this is what I deserved. Breaking and entering another person’s house. Listening in on a conversation that clearly not only broke my heart, but also gave me some hope again. He didn’t do it because he said my name. Then that must mean he still care about me. I sat in the corner and then closed my eyes. Yeah, I deserved the closet. Because I was so quick to go to conclusion, because I actually thought he had played me and that meant that I had doubted him. He was a jerk at first, but he had proven me over these couple of months how nice and funny of a guy he is. It wasn’t right of me to think that about him at all. I knew an Edward, most people didn’t know. I knew that his secret favorite color was purple. I knew that he preferred sleeping on the right side of the bed, because if he slept on the left side, then that was not “right”. I know that he loves coffee and despise cakes and cookies. He told me that he thought of the story Hansel and Gretel, we he saw the pastries and that story scared him. And I know that when he was really mad about something he would give, not only a glare that will make your toes curl up but has lips will be in a tight line and his nose will expanded. He would pretty much look like a bull that had seen red. 

I heard a creaking sound and felt that some light was hitting my face. When I opened them, I truly regretted every single thing I had done in my life. Because there it stood, the bull. He towered over me, crossing his arms and really looked like a bull that would destroy me like I was nothing. I swallowed hard and then looked up at him, trying to give him and innocent smile, “Hi, great weather.” I then said. I should just not had said anything, because he grabbed by the collar of my blouse and then he lifted me up onto my feet. I still tried to keep myself calm and casual while smiling at him, but I guess that only pissed him more of. I swallowed hard again, because him being silence really made me nervous. He just glared into my eyes, not wavering at all and I tried to look anywhere else than on him. Why do I feel like a kid getting scolded? He then grabbed my face with his other hand and forcefully kissed me. Our lips were pressed hard together and even out teeth started to scrap against one another. I had never been kissed that forceful before and it hurt. Not only psychically, but also mentally. This was not the kiss he gave me the first time. The first time felt so good, this was the exact opposite. He then parted out lips, but he was still glaring at me. “Did you see everything?” he then asked me, and I couldn’t get myself to lie, “yeah. And I am so sorry, I know this was dumb, but.” He then covered my mouth. He didn’t want to hear my excuses, guess I don’t blame the guy. “You are only allowed to say yes and no, understood?” I nodded. He didn’t remove his hand from my mouth, guess he didn’t really trust me. But I guess that since I have been caught, I should just do what he asked, because this would not look good on me, if it ever got out. He breathed a heavy sigh, closing his eyes. He was properly gathering his thought on how to approach this. When he finally looked at me again his questions then began, “Were you here before I got home?” I nodded. He sighed again, “Did you cry?” I nodded. I guess I noticed my tears stained cheeks and my eyes were properly red from all the crying. He then got closer to me. Both of our chests touched each other now “Are you here because of jealousy?” I nodded again and this time I managed to look away, answering these questions made me ashamed. He then leaned over to my ear and whispered, “do you love me?”. My heart just stopped. Everything stopped as I could feel the heat from his breath on my ear. I then shakily nodded my head, tears started to press again in the corner of my eyes. He then removed his hand form my mouth and give me the same kiss he had given me the first time. Sweet and pure and so satisfying. He let go of his grip on my collar and instead intertwined his hand into my hair and pressed my head even closer to is own. The kiss turned hungrier now and I didn’t mind. His other hand was placed on my waist and pushed me again even closer to him. He kissed me so deeply and passionately that I had a hard time breathing at all. The warmth from the places he touched me accelerated and spread to the rest of my body as I breathed harder. He then let go of me and a small whine escaped my lips as he pulled away. His was breathing just as hard as mine, which only seemed to excite me more. “let me have you.” He then said and I couldn’t think of anything else than doing just that. I nodded again and then he took my hand and started to lead me upstairs. I was in a complete daze, the only thing I could focus on was his hand in my and the steps we took as we got closer to the bedroom. Right outside of his bedroom door, he stopped, and I almost bumped into him, but I noticed that he had stopped just in time. I then woke up enough to give him a confused look. He then took a deep breath and then looked at me, “I had wanted this day to be our first time and I even wanted our first time to be gentle and loving. But since you broke into my house and stalked me through a closet door. I don’t really think that you deserve that.” He then gave me a cruel smile and before I could comment on it, he had opened the door and dragged me in. He threw me on the bed, landing on my back. I looked up on him with lust and a bit of fear as he stood at the end of the bed. His glare was animalistic with lust. He licked his lips as he lost his tie. I was about to sit up, when he towered over me and covered my whole body with his. He looked deep into my eyes before he heads for the neck a bate hard. A whine escaped my lips, but he didn’t seem to care. He ripped my blouse into pieces together with my bra and then bate my breast. I whined again, but he still didn’t seem to care. He started to twist my nipple while ripping my pants into shreds. When it was only my panties that were left, he lifted himself up again to stare down at me. My heart was beating so loud, I had never tried anything like this before, only in my fantasies. He then started to remove the rest of his clothing seductively leaving only his pants. First then could I see that he even had an amazing body. His body reminded me of the amor sculpture, so perfectly made and formed. Everything was symmetric and his alabaster skin only became clearer to me. He was beautiful, but his eyes were still cold to stare into and it made me want to cry. He then flipped me over onto my stomach and then lifted my hips. I could feel that he removed my panties slowly, like he wanted to admire my most embarrassing place up close. A small growl came from behind me that made my heart jump. I could feel something slimy started to run down my thigh and felt so embarrassed that it was my own juices spilling out. I low evil chuckle then came and then a tongue was following my slick up to the base of its creation. A pleasured whine came out between my lips as I felt his fingers enter my entrance and a tongue circling around my clit. I couldn’t stop myself from moaning with pleasure as a warmth started to build in the base of my stomach. Then a hand landed on my but cheek and it made me moan even louder. He started to thrust even faster with two fingers inside of me and tongue still swirling around. I couldn’t keep my voice down, it felt so great. He then just stopped with everything and I couldn’t stop myself from saying “don’t stop, please.” While whines escaped my lips. He then lifted me up so that we were face to face, until he pushed my head down to his crouch. He still had his pants on, but heat and arousal struck me even harder when I could see how must in pain his dick must have been in being locked away like that. I zipped down his pants with my teeth and unbuttoned it with my lips. He then started to assist me by pushing both the pants and underwear down till I was staring at it. My whole mouth was filled with saliva and I just wanted to swallow it. And I did. I licked carefully first the tip, then I dragged my tongue down the side of it tasting it, leaving its smell on me. I started to let it inside my mouth and when the tip had entered, I felt his hand on the back of my head and pushed my head down on it, making me choke. But he kept my head there for a few seconds before letting me retrieve to breath. I guess this was also a part of my punishment. I then grabbed it with one of my hands and then swallowed it again, taking it to the base like he wanted me to. It was rewarding hearing him moan above me, I took a sneak peek up on him and his eyes were complete fixated on me. I started to retrieve and when his hand got placed behind my head again pushed to the base. This time I was a bit more prepared and didn’t choke on his member this time. I swallowed him whole and he quickly pulled me away again. He pushed me down and without a warning he entered me to the brink. Pain and pleasure washed over me and I moaned even louder. When he started to move back and forth, I covered my mouth from screaming even louder bit he didn’t let me. He took both of my hands and pinned them above my head as he kissed me hungrily on the mouth while moaning himself. His paced then started to quicken and I could fell that I was closing into a climax. He moved his lips from my mouth and started to tease my nibble between his teeth which sent my over the edge. “I’m cumming!” I screamed and then came, but that didn’t slow him down. He kept banging into me and kept expanding my climax even further. He then started to shake himself and moaned even louder, pushing his member even further in, while grabbing onto me tight. I could feel is cum shooting into me and it made me cum again. He stayed in that position until he was no longer tense and started to relax. He laid on top of me and we were both out of breath. He started to softly kiss my bitemark on my neck as I slowly lost consciousness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now I have written the first sex scene. I will also point out that this was my very first, so if it is a bit wonky then don't judge.  
> :P


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